Off Topic Jokes thread
- Thread starter devonFRATTONiser
- Start date
-
Please bear with us on the new site integration and fixing any known bugs over the coming days. If you can not log in please try resetting your password and check your spam box. If you have tried these steps and are still struggling email [email protected] with your username/registered email address
-
Man City Fan opens his season ticket Christmas present
You must log in or register to see images
I asked for lots of salt and vinegar on my fish
You must log in or register to see images
and chips
You must log in or register to see images
and was presented with this...how rude
You must log in or register to see images
You must log in or register to see images
You must log in or register to see images
You must log in or register to see images
On Christmas morning I am getting up early to cut the garden hedge.
Then later I will be sitting down to Christmas dinner with all the trimmings....
Then later I will be sitting down to Christmas dinner with all the trimmings....
5 years ago today I lost my lovely wife.
What a poker game that was....
What a poker game that was....
The downside of having a Son who is a Bomb Disposal Technician.
It took him Nine Hours to Open his Christmas Presents last year.
It took him Nine Hours to Open his Christmas Presents last year.
A teacher goes around her class asking each of the kids what do they need at home.
1st kid says "A computer".
Teacher replies "That'd be very useful."
2nd kid says "A new lawn mower" and gets a similar response.
Little Johnny pops up and says: " At my house we don't need anything."
The teacher asks him to think again carefully as everybody needs something.
Little Johnny replies, "Nope I'm sure! When my sister started dating a Scouser, I remember dad saying,"Well, that's the last f...ing thing we need!!!"
1st kid says "A computer".
Teacher replies "That'd be very useful."
2nd kid says "A new lawn mower" and gets a similar response.
Little Johnny pops up and says: " At my house we don't need anything."
The teacher asks him to think again carefully as everybody needs something.
Little Johnny replies, "Nope I'm sure! When my sister started dating a Scouser, I remember dad saying,"Well, that's the last f...ing thing we need!!!"
I met some chess enthusiasts in a hotel lobby recently. They just kept bragging about how good they were at the game.
There's nothing worse than chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.
There's nothing worse than chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.
Saw my doctor today, he said "What's the problem?"
I said "I keep feeling like I'm an ocean"
He said, "Can you be more pacific?"
I said "I keep feeling like I'm an ocean"
He said, "Can you be more pacific?"