I phoned a Radio Station today, to enter their mystery prize competition. The presenter answered and said, "Congratulations on being our first caller, all you need to do is answer the following question correctly, to win our Mystery Grand Star Prize' "That's Fantastic!" I called out in delight. "Feel Confident?" The presenter asked, "It's a geography Question." "Well, I've got a degree in Geography from Salford University," | proudly replied, "and I've taught Geography to A level students for the last 10 vears" "Ok then, to win our grand prize of 2 VIP tickets to the premier of new Barbie movie and to meet actors afterwards, what is the capital of France?" "Islamabad", I replied.
Due to the awful weather conditions, I’ve just visited our 80 year old neighbour to ask if she needed anything from the shops. Turns out she did, so I’ve given her my list too, no point in all of us going out in this #snow ...
Why does my wife always wait till I'm at the other end of the house before asking me to "Merm frner mernferr brnerfer!"?
An old man finds a condom in his grandson's apartment and asks what it is. "It's a condom," replies the grandson, sheepishly. "What do you use it for?" asks Grandpa. The grandson is embarrassed, so he says, "I use it to keep my cigarettes dry when I smoke in the rain." Grandpa says, "That's a great idea." He goes to the drug store and asks the pharmacist for a condom. "What size would you like?" asks the pharmacist. "Big enough to fit a Camel.
