Has anybody...

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i was at a house party about 2 years ago and it was open plan, so ye could see the kitchen from the main front room n that

while absolutely pissed, i just casually walked to the kitchen sink and took a piss, no one was none the wiser, until i realized the sink was next to a ****ing window and some ****s are outside having a cig while gasping like scream at my enormous todger pulping clear sparkly piss

id love to be at a party n celotape a tap handle onto my cròtch and make a lass drink my piss like a water fountain
ah bisto
 
When I was about 16 a group of us went to a party, drank a lot and smoked some weed. We were all staying at a mate's house and when we woke up the next morning we discovered that one of my pals had shat on a chair. Unfortunately one of the other lads had left his brand new leather jacket on the chair.

My brother's mate once took a slash on a coffee table that due to too much booze and weed he thought was a toilet. The girl they were staying with was house sitting for a friend of her parents.
 
I once woke up, or rather came to, on the floor of a house in Hampstead, surrounded by snoring bodies. My mate was shaking me, saying "quick,let's get out of here". I couldn't really understand his urgency until we'd left the party house and were safely sitting on the tube, when he explained that I had got up in the night and taken a piss in an armchair. Unfortunately the armchair was occupied at the time. The occupant slept on, drenched in piss
 
I like to do my bit for recycling, I once pissed straight up into the air and drank it as it came back down. Sounds easy and it is at first but as I was nearing the end the fountain of water was getting smaller and smaller and the trajectory lower and lower so I had to be quick and duck down sharpish while easing myself onto a table and managed to swallow the last few drops while I was upside down.
I'll not be trying that one again anytime soon, it's straight down in the trousers for me from now on.
 
I was at a trendy club in Kensington that had a Morrocan themed decor. There were candles on the shelf above the toilet so i played fireman by pissing from candle to candle.
 
Went on holiday to Ayia Napa with a group of friends. We decided it would be funny to piss on the floor of every nightclub we went to. One lad was sat across a table from a bird he was chatting up and we noticed him cracking up with laughter, then we noticed he was pissing on the floor. Don't think he managed to pull her.
 
^^^^
Firstly a wid ,love exotic birds & secondly Isn't this why Mick gets ****ty letters threatening to shut him down & why his supermods quit?