H
Hack Watch
- Thread starter humanbeingincroydon
- Start date
-
Please bear with us on the new site integration and fixing any known bugs over the coming days. If you can not log in please try resetting your password and check your spam box. If you have tried these steps and are still struggling email [email protected] with your username/registered email address
-
It's probably a pointless exercise to mention TalkShite's head WUM, Durham, on these pages. But I did just want to mention some of his antics last week, proving he has no boundaries when it comes to wummery. Starting with the statement we had "bottled it", he then decided that if Arsenal won the cup and got into the top four they would have had a better season than us, and if ManU won the EL they would have had a better season than us too (including of course the undeserved League Cup win). Well that's the usual crap we expect from him. The main point was when he declared that Spurs fans would be glad to see the back of WHL due to the "terrible" results we have had there (even had one of those stupid polls with a few of our less proud games as "the most memorable" at the Lane). My main problems with this slimeball is (1) he has no shame in what he WUMs about. The first few of those are par for the course, but he clearly has no boundaries because anyone with an ounce of sense would realise that the stadium should be off limits - and it was for most people. This is also the guy who joked about Ledley being a legend because he hadn't won enough trophies, something else he should have shut up about, and (2) His WUMs are not evenly distributed among the clubs. Us and Arsenal get far more of his crap, yet ManC, ManU, Chelski and Liverpool, who arguably deserve far more given the lack of performance compared to money spent and "expectations", get much less. Anyway, just wanted to rant here because there's no way I'm calling into TalkShite!
H
Hoddle is a god
Guest
I listen to TalkShite all the time in the car. I don't get to hear much of it just lately, as most of my journeys now are short distances, compared with the journeys I was undertaking throughout most of last year.
However, I have a grudging respect for Durham, but only because I believe that he knows full well what he's doing.
His job is to get and keep listeners.
He knows full well that the best way to get and keep Mousers is to blow rings of smoke up their arses.
He knows that the best way to get and keep Chavs is to occasionally blow rings of smoke up their arses, but to put the wum-boot in at judicious times.
He knows that the best way to get and keep Gooners and Yids is to continually put the wum-boot in. Perhaps it's a sense of our own self-worthlessness that makes us fall for his **** each and every time?
He knows that there's little point in trying to wind-up United fans, as most of those are plastics.
As for City - he's too intent on blowing rings of smoke up Liam Gallagher's arse to ever dare to put the wum-boot in.
As for the other clubs, it must be the case that their marketing research shows that they are too scattered and few in numbers to be worth the effort either way.
Once you learn and appreciate all of this, nothing that Durham ever says will either come as any surprise, or have any lasting effect on you.
However, I have a grudging respect for Durham, but only because I believe that he knows full well what he's doing.
His job is to get and keep listeners.
He knows full well that the best way to get and keep Mousers is to blow rings of smoke up their arses.
He knows that the best way to get and keep Chavs is to occasionally blow rings of smoke up their arses, but to put the wum-boot in at judicious times.
He knows that the best way to get and keep Gooners and Yids is to continually put the wum-boot in. Perhaps it's a sense of our own self-worthlessness that makes us fall for his **** each and every time?
He knows that there's little point in trying to wind-up United fans, as most of those are plastics.
As for City - he's too intent on blowing rings of smoke up Liam Gallagher's arse to ever dare to put the wum-boot in.
As for the other clubs, it must be the case that their marketing research shows that they are too scattered and few in numbers to be worth the effort either way.
Once you learn and appreciate all of this, nothing that Durham ever says will either come as any surprise, or have any lasting effect on you.
When I wrote this I didn't realise that it would prove to be prophetic..........in today's Daily Star......
"Man United boss Jose Mourinho's planning £110m triple raid on Tottenham."
1) In the current transfer market insanity it would take a **** load more than £110m to get Die, Rose and Walker. All 3 signed new contracts in September 2016. All 3 are are English. All 3 are highly rated. And all 3 have Daniel Levy as a Chairman.
2) Daniel Levy is the Spurs Chairman
3) United haye dealing with Daniel Levy
4) There is a bloke at spurs who has refused to sell a single player wanted by the club to anothed Premier league team for 9 years...think his name is Daniel Levy.
5) its the Star
6) its maureen
7) its united
With all those things factored in I am guessing it's bollocks
2) Daniel Levy is the Spurs Chairman
3) United haye dealing with Daniel Levy
4) There is a bloke at spurs who has refused to sell a single player wanted by the club to anothed Premier league team for 9 years...think his name is Daniel Levy.
5) its the Star
6) its maureen
7) its united
With all those things factored in I am guessing it's bollocks
I loved Garth Crooks when he was at Spurs. The partnership with Archibald was fabulous and was a big part in our cup wins at the time. But as a journalist he really talks some rubbish. Not happy with selecting 3 right backs for his team of the week http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/39915228, he has to say this 
Forward - Mesut Ozil (Arsenal)
A lot has been said about Mesut Ozil. Love him or hate him - and I love him - there is no denying he is a wonderful footballer. Is he in the right team? Probably not. A player with his talent would be more appreciated at a club like Tottenham.
Now at this moment I may have Arsenal fans foaming at the mouth at the very thought of Ozil defecting to White Hart Lane but frankly it is a better fit.
When Sol Campbell decided to move to Arsenal from Spurs it was because the player was desperate to win trophies. A perfectly acceptable position for a professional footballer to take and a fact that Spurs fans have never been able to come to terms with.
However, Ozil's style of football is perfect for Spurs and he has already won things with Arsenal. His overall performance against Stoke, which is always a hard nut to crack, was superb while his goal was sublime.
Only at Spurs will the fans accommodate players like Ozil. You see, at Spurs it is all about the football while at Arsenal it is all about the winning.
Forward - Mesut Ozil (Arsenal)
You must log in or register to see images
A lot has been said about Mesut Ozil. Love him or hate him - and I love him - there is no denying he is a wonderful footballer. Is he in the right team? Probably not. A player with his talent would be more appreciated at a club like Tottenham.
Now at this moment I may have Arsenal fans foaming at the mouth at the very thought of Ozil defecting to White Hart Lane but frankly it is a better fit.
When Sol Campbell decided to move to Arsenal from Spurs it was because the player was desperate to win trophies. A perfectly acceptable position for a professional footballer to take and a fact that Spurs fans have never been able to come to terms with.
However, Ozil's style of football is perfect for Spurs and he has already won things with Arsenal. His overall performance against Stoke, which is always a hard nut to crack, was superb while his goal was sublime.
Only at Spurs will the fans accommodate players like Ozil. You see, at Spurs it is all about the football while at Arsenal it is all about the winning.
H
Hoddle is a god
Guest
Garth, think before you blink, son!
It's **** like this that give fuel to lame, third-rate wumsters, like Pixie ffs!
It turns out that TV Tropes is missing a section of the following article: http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/CriticalResearchFailure
News: Kelvin Mackenzie Leaves The Sun
Situations Vacant. National newspaper requires racist, misogynist columnist. Previous LBC work preferred.
Situations Vacant. National newspaper requires racist, misogynist columnist. Previous LBC work preferred.
In today's latest bit of hacketry, apparently this tweet is confirmation that Toby is off in the summer
So based on this quote-unquote logic, does the fact that Philipe Coutinho hasn't posted to his Twitter feed in over eighteen months mean that he's miserable at Liverpool and can't wait to leave? Does Alexis Sanchez retweeting a video of him giving his shirt to a fan in the crowd mean that he'll be off this summer? Does the recent series of tweets from Sergio Aguero talking about their title win of five years ago mean he's reminding City fans of the good times prior to his departure?
You must log in or register to see media
The hacks are aware that we won't be playing on a building site next season...right?So based on this quote-unquote logic, does the fact that Philipe Coutinho hasn't posted to his Twitter feed in over eighteen months mean that he's miserable at Liverpool and can't wait to leave? Does Alexis Sanchez retweeting a video of him giving his shirt to a fan in the crowd mean that he'll be off this summer? Does the recent series of tweets from Sergio Aguero talking about their title win of five years ago mean he's reminding City fans of the good times prior to his departure?
Most of our players have tweets like Toby's. If it is a signal of imminent departure we will have to start with 25 new players! Apart from Walker who has stopped posting to Twitter. Hmm....
H
Hoddle is a god
Guest
...and does it mean that all of our fans will no longer be supporting us, and defecting to Arsenal?
Lloris £35m
Rose £60m
Walker £50m
Toby £45m
Vertongen £35m
Trippier £20m
Davies £20m
Eriksen £40m
Dele £70m
Son £35m
Dembele £25m
Dier £35m
Wanyama £40m
Kane £75m
Sissoko £2.49
Total £585,000,002.49
That's most of the stadium paid for then
Rose £60m
Walker £50m
Toby £45m
Vertongen £35m
Trippier £20m
Davies £20m
Eriksen £40m
Dele £70m
Son £35m
Dembele £25m
Dier £35m
Wanyama £40m
Kane £75m
Sissoko £2.49
Total £585,000,002.49
That's most of the stadium paid for then
H
Hoddle is a god
Guest
Lloris £35m
Rose £60m
Walker £50m
Toby £45m
Vertongen £35m
Trippier £20m
Davies £20m
Eriksen £40m
Dele £70m
Son £35m
Dembele £25m
Dier £35m
Wanyama £40m
Kane £75m
Sissoko £2.49
Total £585,000,002.49
That's most of the stadium paid for then
...and Poch can give our schoolboys some vital experience, next season.
Sorted.
That's why they were on the pitch during our end of WHL ceremony yesterday...getting s taste of a big loud crowd before next season!...and Poch can give our schoolboys some vital experience, next season.
Sorted.
S
Spur of the Moment
Guest
Think you have underestimated Kane and Dele by £20m each......... and overestimated Sissoko by £2!!Lloris £35m
Rose £60m
Walker £50m
Toby £45m
Vertongen £35m
Trippier £20m
Davies £20m
Eriksen £40m
Dele £70m
Son £35m
Dembele £25m
Dier £35m
Wanyama £40m
Kane £75m
Sissoko £2.49
Total £585,000,002.49
That's most of the stadium paid for then
There's a glut of articles today suggesting a summer move for Mesut Ozil.
Has it not occurred to any of these hacks that a movie for Ozil would bollocks up our wage structure to sign a player who, given his non-existent workrate, would be a horrible fit for the team? I mean, I know people on here say Chelsea have a squad that makes it possible to use Hazard as an option from the bench in some games, but I really can't see why we'd be paying Eriksen's understudy twice as much as Eriksen every week...
Has it not occurred to any of these hacks that a movie for Ozil would bollocks up our wage structure to sign a player who, given his non-existent workrate, would be a horrible fit for the team? I mean, I know people on here say Chelsea have a squad that makes it possible to use Hazard as an option from the bench in some games, but I really can't see why we'd be paying Eriksen's understudy twice as much as Eriksen every week...
By us?!
I've been saying for months that I expect Man Utd to try and sign him.
I can still see it happening, especially if Arsenal miss out on the CL and Utd sneak in via the Europa.
He will make a good agent when he retires, Mr 10%, that equates to the amount of effort he puts in.