Off Topic Compare the cheese to no 10 thread

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Red Hadron Collider said:
Not really Cheese-related, but I may as well put it here as anywhere. My eldest went for a date last week with the son of an old mate of and his Mrs. She's aware that when I first started seeing her mother, I was shagging the lad's Mum. My old mate ****ed around all the time at that time, so I didn't feel too bad about it. It's not going any further, but I did have a wry smile thinking that would be an interesting wedding day <laugh> She became known as 'Piss-woman' to my mate's as she's a squirter. Massively attractive. When I was ****ing her, she was a full-time popmobility instructor <ok>
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Eh? What kind of a date was that ffs?
 
Popmobility dates her ffs. I'd wager she's wearing pop socks and tena ladies these days <laugh>
 
Squirters are a novelty for a one off, but a proper pain if they're your regular bang.
 
Tobes said:
Squirters are a novelty for a one off, but a proper pain if they're your regular bang.
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I remember vividly remember how it all started. She was a hairdresser back then and used to cut my hair. She was cutting it one Saturday and said Peter (her husband) was away for the weekend. I had a couple of mates coming round (reporter and my mate in London), so I asked her why not come round for a drink. I didn't mention my mates were coming round, but I did mention my parents were away on holiday.

The bell went at about 8 pm and when I opened the door, it was her. I asked her to come in as my mates were there (she knew them both).She said no as that's not what she had in mind. I asked her if she wanted me to come round to hers and she said yes. I ****ed my mates off and got round there pronto. What a ****ing night <laugh>
 
Red Hadron Collider said:
I remember vividly remember how it all started. She was a hairdresser back then and used to cut my hair. She was cutting it one Saturday and said Peter (her husband) was away for the weekend. I had a couple of mates coming round (reporter and my mate in London), so I asked her why not come round for a drink. I didn't mention my mates were coming round, but I did mention my parents were away on holiday.

The bell went at about 8 pm and when I opened the door, it was her. I asked her to come in as my mates were there (she knew them both).She said no as that's not what she had in mind. I asked her if she wanted me to come round to hers and she said yes. I ****ed my mates off and got round there pronto. What a ****ing night <laugh>
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How long ago was this?
 
Tobes said:
She's be as dry as a wholegrain Ryvita now lad.

The only gushing that'll be going on down there, will be when she laughs and pisses herself
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What are you? The 'pirate' out of Dodgeball? <laugh>

I haven't seen her in a good while, but she was still worth one when I did. The daughter is a stunner an' all<ok>
 
Red Hadron Collider said:
What are you? The 'pirate' out of Dodgeball? <laugh>

I haven't seen her in a good while, but she was still worth one when I did. The daughter is a stunner an' all<ok>
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What are you on about? <whistle>

She must be knocking 60 now ffs <laugh>

Then again, you do have a penchant for the more mature ladies......
 
Red Hadron Collider said:
I remember vividly remember how it all started. She was a hairdresser back then and used to cut my hair. She was cutting it one Saturday and said Peter (her husband) was away for the weekend. I had a couple of mates coming round (reporter and my mate in London), so I asked her why not come round for a drink. I didn't mention my mates were coming round, but I did mention my parents were away on holiday.

The bell went at about 8 pm and when I opened the door, it was her. I asked her to come in as my mates were there (she knew them both).She said no as that's not what she had in mind. I asked her if she wanted me to come round to hers and she said yes. I ****ed my mates off and got round there pronto. What a ****ing night <laugh>
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FFS...<doh>

you sure you're not pissed or stoned still...? <laugh>
 
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