Cabaye should have went. I understand why it happened, if you've played any football you'll have been in similar scenarios. You see someone coming in at pace looking to get the ball and wipe you, ans the natural reaction is to stick out your foot to defend yourself instead of going for the ball. But you can't do it and its dangerous, straight red 3 match ban. Spearing got the ball but I have no doubt the little ****er was overly aggressive and was trying to nail the playmaker. Thats football and he was in the wrong. I can see him getting away with it as there was enough doubt watching it real time. Depends if the ref claims he saw it as I don't think he saw it fully.
Colo was accidental and just a footballing incident. Unfortunate but no malice.
Agree with most of what youve said mate, defo dont think there was anything in the sideshow bob incident at all. However I wudnt exactly describe what Cabaye did as sticking his foot out, he jumped into the tackle two feet off the floor (wasnt a 2footed tackle tho) and it looked more like a stamp to me.
As you mentioned tho Spearing was flying into the tackle which a few years ago wudov been applauded as comitted to the cause and got the crowd going but these days is borderline outlawed e.g. Rodwell on Suarez.