Off Topic And Now for Something Completely Different

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A young man named John received a parrot as a gift.

The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary.

Every word out of the bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity.

John tried and tried to change the bird’s attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and doing anything else he could think of to ‘clean up’ the bird’s vocabulary.

Finally, John was fed up and he yelled at the parrot.

The parrot yelled back. John shook the parrot and the parrot got angrier and even ruder.

John, in desperation, threw up his hand, grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer.

For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed.

Then suddenly there was total quiet. Not a peep was heard for over a minute.

Fearing that he’d hurt the parrot, John quickly opened the door to the freezer.

The parrot calmly stepped out onto John’s outstretched arms and said

“I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I’m sincerely remorseful for my inappropriate transgressions and I fully intend to do everything I can to correct my rude and unforgivable behaviour.”

John was stunned at the change in the bird’s attitude.

As he was about to ask the parrot what had made such a dramatic change in his behaviour, the bird spoke-up, up very softly,

“May I ask what the turkey did?”
 
Torode's alleged racist remark was him singing along to a Kanye West song in a bar I heard. Not sure how true that is

The allegation of him using racist language while singing Gold Digger at karaoke was not upheld and dismissed.

Another incident of him using the N word was, from the reporting on the BBC.
 
Apparently the trial of the men fighting at Manchester Airport last year is taking place right now not that you would know from watching the regular news channels.

Part of their defence is that they didn't know the people they were fighting with were police and they were fighting for their life's as they were in fear of being killed, among other equally laughable suggestions.
 
Apparently the trial of the men fighting at Manchester Airport last year is taking place right now not that you would know from watching the regular news channels.

Part of their defence is that they didn't know the people they were fighting with were police and they were fighting for their life's as they were in fear of being killed, among other equally laughable suggestions.
I've been checking on it's progress in the Manchester Evening News every night....

It's going to be an interesting outcome!!