Off Topic General chat

eddie the eagle

 

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Ive just been for a haicut anarl. Can we sub the honking whiskey for vodka?

 

Canny pick but could he do a Sunderland accent?

 

I doubt it. He can barely manage a cockney one.

 

.

 

Really? That bad

 

I read it.

 

It was horrendous, mate.

Nobody could understand it

 

Was it about the time you got caught shagging an Ebony blow up BBW doll by the feds in the bushes? They'd never have caught you if you didn't pop her on that thorn.

 

Just had some architects walking around our offices, no word of a lie, I've been doing little quiet farts all day, scentless... they were just walking past when I tried to squeak the last one out... LOUD as ****, completely stank... wtf is that all about? You can't trust anything nowadays, FFS.

 

Nearly spat my tea out.

 

You should have **** on the ****s. I hate poncy architects.

 

Honestly it was repulsive I was nearly sick, it smelled like a dead man's fridge.

 

Zombie movies.

How are there so many zombies and how do they become zombies?

Everytime someone gets attacked about 10 of the ****ers are chomping away.


Also why is every zombie as fast as Ussain Bolt these days?


Guess who's watching a **** zombie movie?

 

Would you shag a zombie if she promised not to bite your tagger?

 

If i ever meet a talking zombie, i'll let you know.

 

Farts and zombies.

May as well not logged on and just kept talking to Mrs Brazil and Ebeneezer Brazil.

 

You can't have a picture of Richard Richard as you're avatar and pretend you're not amused by farts.

 

Midfielder Yaya Toure, 33, will tell new boss Pep Guardiola he wants to stay at Manchester City after rejecting the chance to move to China to be the highest paid player in the world. (Manchester Evening News)

Highest paid player in the world? You're having a laugh football. Take a year off and sort your head out.