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Has a burd...

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Zico, Jul 1, 2011.

  1. Zico

    Zico Active Member

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    ...ever put you in a dangerous position?
     
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  2. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    finger up the arse? just go with it, doesnt mean your gay
     
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  3. Zico

    Zico Active Member

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    I near shat it...ahem...the first time a that happened - thought sum **** else was in the room. <yikes>
     
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  4. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    some birds are dirty cows. my mates bird tongues his brown eye
     
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  5. Eastender

    Eastender Member

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    :huh:
     
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  6. Zico

    Zico Active Member

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    My mates burd pished all over him.

    I don't see the attraction to be honest (even though I have pished the bed with a burd in it, didn't turn me on any)
     
    #6

  7. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    I shat the bed once, well it was more of a shart. oh how we laughed <erm>
     
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  8. Calatron

    Calatron Active Member

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    Yes last year in Vegas she was adamant we should go to Floyd Mayweather's gym to see him even though a local told us it was a bad area, so we went only to stick out like a special kid in a football team within 2 minutes a big black guy came over to me and said some american slang **** which pretty much summed up to get the **** out of my hood whilst flashing a silver gun at me, arse well and truly fell out.
     
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  9. - SW6 -

    - SW6 - Well-Known Member

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    This is a most excellent experience...gratefully received one night from a bird after we went out clubbing and were off our tits back at my house.
     
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  10. Girvan Loyal 1690

    Girvan Loyal 1690 Nobody's safe now

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    my pal's bird does. he says it's amazin. he says she soaks him everytim they shag.
     
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  11. Zico

    Zico Active Member

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    Ma burd squirts if I assault her fanny enough with tougue and finger weapons, canny whack a face ful a roastin' fanny batter. <ok>

    Some burds think they're gonna pish themselves just before squirting.
     
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  12. Jip Jaap Stam

    Jip Jaap Stam General Chat Moderator Staff Member

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    Probably with her driving.
    But seriously, she's been a bit too mouthy in the wrong places/around the wrong people when pissed, that's about as dangerous as it's got.
     
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  13. Calatron

    Calatron Active Member

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    #13
  14. Jip Jaap Stam

    Jip Jaap Stam General Chat Moderator Staff Member

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    Are you Bill or Ted? <laugh>

    A bird did that to me once, it was only my second shag and she was years older than me. I almost had a heart attack.
     
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  15. Otto Flayshow

    Otto Flayshow Well-Known Member

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    A bird in the Dominican Republic emptied my wallet while giving me a BJ. She took me round the back of a bar, pulled my trollies round my ankles and proceeded to suck me off. While I was distracted, she took the wallet out my trouser pocket, extracted only the notes and replaced the wallet. What a pro.
     
    #15
  16. - SW6 -

    - SW6 - Well-Known Member

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    <laugh>

    Might have been the same bird, as it was after I moved to Manchester<laugh>

    It was a surprise to say the least but smart as ****, esp pilled up<ok>
     
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  17. SleepySpecialK

    SleepySpecialK Well-Known Member

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    Stop talking about sex you bastards. Some of us don't get any.
     
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  18. Otto Flayshow

    Otto Flayshow Well-Known Member

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    Nobody forced you to get married.
     
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  19. PointyBirds

    PointyBirds Member

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    Hurr hurr.

    I went out with a squirter in the past. It's less fun that it sounds. While it's a novelty at first and certainly makes you feel like the big man, it results in your mattress becoming absolutely ****ed quite quickly. Also, sleeping in a soaking bed is ****ing freezing during the night.

    My missus is dead boring. I'm always trying to get her to do sick, ****ed-up things to me, but she's happy enough with regular sex.
     
    #19
  20. Zico

    Zico Active Member

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    Whit like?
     
    #20

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