Oooff that’s tough
How come you’re still paying the ex’s? mind you they’re nasty bastards some women
One is a recent ex-wife, we were together twenty years + - divorced last year, and I owe her over the years - she brought up our daughters alone a lot whilst I was working away, when I went through an alcohol crisis and has done a great job as a mother and a best friend/therapist to me. We had just grown into a life of being together with our kids, then they left home, and our sex life had died and our interests diverged. She's an academic in an obscure, non job related field (Farsi poetry), so earns **** all, so couldn't afford her own place if I didn't help out and as she allowed me to work away for so long, it's only fair that I help out. There's part of me that wants to be together, but it will probably happen when my cock stops working and I can't do outdoor activities as much any more, which she doesn't enjoy.
The second is more complicated, from before, a 'weekend' relationship when I was not working, then she got pregnant with my son, we got married and hadnt ever spent more than two days consecutive together. Then when we did, hell broke out. She got an illness that meant she hasn't worked properly for many years, so only qualifies for the lowest social help, and because of my son, I'm obligated to help her out (he helps his mother out financially also). It's an expensive burden, but my son obviously wouldn't be happy if I cut her loose.
Didn't have the best parental instruction/education in relationships growing up, so made a lot of mistakes.