Teddy Bears

[Bigdownunder]

A Man and a Woman meet in a bar and really have a nice time so the Man says " would you like to come back to my place for coffee and conversation?"

The Woman says "Ok" so off they go.

When they arrive at the bedroom the woman is surprised to see the bed head full of teddy bears in different colours and sizes.

Very large at the top, medium size in the middle and small at the bottom.

She thinks at last a sensitive man and agrees to stay.

After a very passionate session she turns to him and says " That was fantastic. How was it for you?"

The Man replies, "Help your self from any bear on the second shelf!"

 

[Agent Bruce]

On a mark of 0-10 how many would a bear on the second shelf be worth?

 

[Blacker-than-Knight]

Note stuck to the fridge door

My Dear Wife,
You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 57
years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you
as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will
not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my
18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don 't be upset----I
shall be home before midnight.
When the man came home late that night, he found the following letter on the
dining room table:

My Dear Husband,
I received your letter and thank you for your honesty about my being 57
years old. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are
also 57 years old. As you know, I am a math teacher at our local college. I
would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel
Fiesta with Michael, one of my students, who is also the assistant tennis
coach. He is young, virile, and like your secretary, is 18 years old.
As a successful businessman who has an excellent knowledge of math, you will
understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small
difference - 18 goes into 57 a lot more times than 57 goes into 18.
Therefore, I will not be home until sometime tomorrow.

 

[JohnHumbles,tape recorder]

Come along, come along,don't be bashful step on up and take a bear!

 

[Agent Bruce]

Nice one Blacker-than-Knight, hadn't heard that one before.

 

[5 Goals 1 Hat Trick 11 Heroes-NUFC4LIFE]

Note stuck to the fridge door

My Dear Wife,
You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 57
years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you
as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will
not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my
18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don 't be upset----I
shall be home before midnight.
When the man came home late that night, he found the following letter on the
dining room table:

My Dear Husband,
I received your letter and thank you for your honesty about my being 57
years old. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are
also 57 years old. As you know, I am a math teacher at our local college. I
would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel
Fiesta with Michael, one of my students, who is also the assistant tennis
coach. He is young, virile, and like your secretary, is 18 years old.
As a successful businessman who has an excellent knowledge of math, you will
understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small
difference - 18 goes into 57 a lot more times than 57 goes into 18.
Therefore, I will not be home until sometime tomorrow.

That's brilliant!

 

[Donkey Toon]

Note stuck to the fridge door

My Dear Wife,
You will surely understand that I have certain needs that you, being 57
years old, can no longer satisfy. I am very happy with you and I value you
as a good wife. Therefore, after reading this letter, I hope that you will
not wrongly interpret the fact that I will be spending the evening with my
18 year old secretary at the Comfort Inn Hotel. Please don 't be upset----I
shall be home before midnight.
When the man came home late that night, he found the following letter on the
dining room table:

My Dear Husband,
I received your letter and thank you for your honesty about my being 57
years old. I would like to take this opportunity to remind you that you are
also 57 years old. As you know, I am a math teacher at our local college. I
would like to inform you that while you read this, I will be at the Hotel
Fiesta with Michael, one of my students, who is also the assistant tennis
coach. He is young, virile, and like your secretary, is 18 years old.
As a successful businessman who has an excellent knowledge of math, you will
understand that we are in the same situation, although with one small
difference - 18 goes into 57 a lot more times than 57 goes into 18.
Therefore, I will not be home until sometime tomorrow.

Classic!