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Your missus. She's a ****ed up ****... Post here how she does your ****in head in.

Discussion in 'The Premier League' started by Schlem Boogerman, May 15, 2021.

  1. duggie2000

    duggie2000 Well-Known Member

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    We will be back in the fiery furnace next season
     
    #101
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  2. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    When we're watching a film together she complains about the volume. This is usually when there is a very loud dramatic important part of the film ongoing.
    So the daft **** expects me to forsee the loud scenes and just in time turn the telly down to protect her precious lugs.
    Fuk sake. I mean a loud scene is there for a reason <doh><cheers>
     
    #102
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  3. Edelman

    Edelman Well-Known Member

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    Yeah I have this argument.
    Also I dont know how many times Ive got to tell her that when the adverts come on theres a volume boost
     
    #103
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  4. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    She is the type who is never happy.
    This morning I made some food. When you make food you make a mess. So I'm tidying up and I'm two steps away from reaching my goal. **** steps in with a cloth as if to say ,"you messy ****. You were gonna leave that **** weren't you ya ****?
     
    #104
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  5. Edelman

    Edelman Well-Known Member

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    This sounds soooooo familiar :emoticon-0121-angry
     
    #105
    Schlem Boogerman likes this.
  6. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    She never washes the chopping board. It's like she's saying "that's your ****, sort it"

    On the rare occasion she does do the board she leaves it propped up against the drainer so it ends up ****in warped.
    She's doing this **** to right fuk me off and it works.
    30 ****in years of this ****e :emoticon-0147-emo:
     
    #106

  7. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    I can guarantee she'll be pissed off tomorrow cos I've had 3, yeah, only three bottles of wine tonight. It's friwednwsday FFS!
     
    #107
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  8. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    Got this when I tried to post but forgot to write summat <doh>
    Screenshot_2021-05-19-21-31-33-23.jpg
     
    #108
  9. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    Dikhed
     
    #109
  10. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    So we have sex three times a year. Bday bday Xmas. She's a Lucky ****.
     
    #110
  11. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    Anyone else got a four inch clitoris?
     
    #111
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  12. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    Just like to add on the alcohol consumption side. It's a weekday and I'm on leave.
    If I'm working tomorrow it's a whisky Wednesday <cheers>
     
    #112
    PINKIE likes this.
  13. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    Sleeping on the couch again tonight bro ?
     
    #113
  14. Tobes

    Tobes Warden Forum Moderator

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    Wowzers
     
    #114
  15. Sucky

    Sucky peoples champ & forum saviour

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    #115
  16. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    Yey, happy Schlem. Got any green? Fuked since my son gave it up :afro:
     
    #116
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  17. Sucky

    Sucky peoples champ & forum saviour

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    Yeh loads mate <laugh>
     
    #117
    PINKIE likes this.
  18. Schlem Boogerman

    Schlem Boogerman Well-Known Member

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    Send me sum. Mates rates?
     
    #118
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  19. Sucky

    Sucky peoples champ & forum saviour

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    Ffs<laugh>

    Can't you source some a bit closer like?

    I dont sell drugsā„¢
     
    #119
    Schlem Boogerman likes this.
  20. Sucky

    Sucky peoples champ & forum saviour

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    Fukrz tryna get me banned <laugh>
     
    #120

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