2 Irish men on an old air base have been told to measure the height of a flag pole, while they are scratching there chins, an English man walks by and asks if he can help . The Irish men ask him how he would measure it . He goes away brings back a spanner and unbolts the pole. Lays it down and measures it. The Irish men burst out laughing and say .You daft sod , we need the height not the length .
Cheers Ron With the Euro losing value against the Dollar, American auto giant Ford have decided to acquire French auto maker Renault. The engineering teams from the two companies have already got together to create the perfect small car for women. Combining parts from the Renault Clio and the Ford Taurus, they have come up with the Cli-taurus. It comes in pink, the average male car thief will not be able to find it, let alone turn it on – even if someone tells them where it is and how to do it. Word from the factory is that it leaks transmission fluid once a month and can be a real bitch to start in the morning. Some have reported that on cold winter mornings when you really need it, you cannot even get it to turn over. New models are initially fun to own but they are costly to maintain and getting rid of them can be horribly expensive. Used models may initially appear to have curb appeal and a low price but they eventually have an increased appetite for fuel; and the curb weight typically increases exponentially with age. They are baffled as to how the size of the trunk increases but say that the paint on the boot may just make it look bigger. This model is not expected to make collector status; and most owners might find it best to lease one and replace it as needed.
Prison is just one word to you, but for some people, it’s a whole sentence. Scientists got together to study the effects of alcohol on a person’s walk, and the result was staggering. I’m trying to organize a hide and seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
Dad, are we pyromaniacs? Yes, we arson. What do you call a pig with laryngitis? Disgruntled. Writing my name in cursive is my signature move.
"I hear your husband just died?" "Yes, it was very sudden". "Did he have time for any last words?" "He did indeed. He said, 'Yes, your bum does look big in that'!".
