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What day of the week is it thread

Discussion in 'Wycombe' started by Guywanderer, Mar 15, 2020.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3401
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 12, 2022
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3402
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 12, 2022
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    An American touring Spain stopped at a local restaurant following a day
    of sightseeing. While sipping his sangria, he noticed a sizzling,
    scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table. Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful. He asked the waiter, "What is that you just served"...?
    The waiter replied, "Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are bulls testicles from the bull fight this morning. A delicacy"...
    The American, though momentarily daunted, said, "What the hell, I'm on
    vacation! Bring me an order"...
    The waiter replied, "I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per
    day because there is only one bull fight each morning. If you come early tomorrow and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy"...
    The next day, the American returned, placed his order, and then that evening he was served the one and only special delicacy of the day. After a few bites, and inspecting the contents of his platter, he called to the waiter and said, "These are delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones i saw you serve yesterday"...
    The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, "Si senor. Sometimes the bull wins"...
     
    #3403
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 13, 2022
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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A woman went on vacation, leaving her husband behind. Before she left, she told him to take extra special care of her cat.
    The next day she called her husband and asked if the cat was all right. Her husband said: The cat just died. She burst into tears and said: How could you be so blunt? Why couldn't you have broken the news gradually! Today, you could have said that it was playing on the roof; tomorrow, you could have said that it fell off and had broken its leg; then on the third day, you could have said that the poor thing had passed away in the night.
    You could have been more sensitive about the whole thing. By the way, how is my mom? Husband: She is playing on the roof.........
     
    #3404
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 13, 2022
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3405
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 13, 2022
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  6. Guywanderer

    Guywanderer Well-Known Member

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    IMG-20220613-WA0001.jpg
     
    #3406
    Guywanderer, Jun 13, 2022
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3407
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 13, 2022
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3408
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 13, 2022
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3409
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 13, 2022
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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3410
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 13, 2022
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3411
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 13, 2022
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  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3412
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 13, 2022
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  13. Guywanderer

    Guywanderer Well-Known Member

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    IMG-20220613-WA0002.jpg
     
    #3413
    Guywanderer, Jun 14, 2022
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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    The worst pub I’ve ever been to
    was called The Fiddle.
    It really was a vile Inn.
     
    #3414
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 14, 2022
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  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3415
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 14, 2022
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I've just been offered a franchise in Texas with a German car manufacturer. My Job Title is Audi Partner.
     
    #3416
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 14, 2022
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3417
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 15, 2022
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  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3418
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 15, 2022
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  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A priest is going round visiting his parishioners. He visits one couple and asks them if they have any children. "No," the woman replies. "God never blessed us with children." "Oh, that's a shame," says the priest. "I'm going to Rome next week so I'll light a candle and pray for you." Ten years later, he and the woman meet again. "Hello," says the priest. "Do you remember me?" "I sure do," replies the woman. "And I now have ten children." "Ten children?" the priest asks. "That's fantastic! Can I speak to your husband to congratulate him?" "No," replies the woman. "He's gone to Rome to blow out that bloody candle."
     
    #3419
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 15, 2022
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #3420
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 15, 2022
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