A soldier who was renting a house from me has done a runner owing me six months rent. He told me he was a General, but I’ve since discovered he’s a Left Tenant.
I ordered a military fancy dress costume, but there was a bit of a cock up with the order half came as a 5th century warlord,the other part was a sisters of the holy order habit...too late to send it back so went as, Attila the Nun
Apart from having osteoarthritis have now been diagnosed with brittle bone disease......still musn't crumble
Jack is on his death bed, and he says to his wife, "Can you give me one last wish?" She says, "Anything you want." He says, "After I die, will you marry Larry?" She says, "But I thought you hated Larry." With his last breath, he says, "I do."
After the judge sentenced Boris Becker to 2½ years he asked her how many months that was. She told him "That's 30 Love".
