This is probably an urban myth but my mate told me that when you die (with the exception of by asphyxiation or drowning) that rigor mortis sets in on the boaby first. Since then, at every funeral I've been to of a male, I've imagined them lying in there with a brickie
There's the old joke - A widow;s in the chapel of rest and they can't get the coffin lid down so she turns round to the undertaker and says "cut his penis off". The Undertaker duly removes the dead man's todger and the wife grabs it off him, turns the corpse over and shoves it right up his arse. A small tear forms in the corner of the dead man's eye. "Now you know how it feels you dirty bastard" she screams.
The only time I think I might need one is after a **** load of ale... the combo of alcohol and a condom completely wipes my old fella off his stride! ... Are they addictive though? Will your soldier stand to attention without viagra in future? (trying hard not to sound too paranoid)
