Time to give up smoking?

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by GroveRanger, Dec 22, 2017.

  1. GroveRanger

    GroveRanger Well-Known Member

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    http://metro.co.uk/2017/12/22/man-chopped-flatmates-penis-off-didnt-like-smoking-7178725/

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    A man who didn’t like his flatmate’s smoking is facing a lengthy prison sentence after he chopped his penis off. Eduard Assylove, 37, was found decapitated and with his limbs and genitals chopped off after his flatmate went ‘berserk’ for lighting up in their flat. Assylov’s head, arms, legs and genitals were found on top of a blood-soaked pillow at their home in Moscow. He also had his ears and the middle finger of his left hand chopped off.

    Ooooffttt!!!

    Vape anyone?
     
    #1
  2. Gambol

    Gambol George Clooney's wee brother

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    Smoking is cool as ****.
     
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  3. Toby

    Toby GC's Life Coach

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    Shut the **** up you pointless fat little dwarf.
     
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  4. Archers Road

    Archers Road Urban Spaceman

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    Might show that to my son. He's living with me at the moment, and thinks I can't tell when he's been smoking in the flat.
     
    #4
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  5. Archers Road

    Archers Road Urban Spaceman

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    Only in Humphrey Bogart movies.

    Humph didn't have to pay a tenner for a pack of Lucky Strikes with photos of dead babies and amputated feet all over them.
     
    #5
  6. DevAdvocate

    DevAdvocate Gigging bassist

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    I like how the headline says he had his penis chopped off as if that was the worst thing that happened. As tragic as it would be to lose one's penis (not for everyone though obviously) I think getting your head cut off is a bit more of a blow.
     
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  7. Archers Road

    Archers Road Urban Spaceman

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    In an either/or situation, it would still be a tough choice though, eh?
     
    #7
  8. GroveRanger

    GroveRanger Well-Known Member

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    There are many on GC who appear to do quite well without a brain tbh.
     
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  9. DevAdvocate

    DevAdvocate Gigging bassist

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    It depends on your definition of doing quite well though.
     
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  10. Archers Road

    Archers Road Urban Spaceman

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    Barely functioning <ok>
     
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  11. Toby

    Toby GC's Life Coach

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    You joined the army and spend 80% of your day beeling on here.

    I wouldn't say you're doing that well :frown:
     
    #11
  12. Gambol

    Gambol George Clooney's wee brother

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    Am doin great, thanks :grin:
     
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  13. Jip Jaap Stam

    Jip Jaap Stam General Chat Moderator
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    ^^^ pished already
     
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  14. Gambol

    Gambol George Clooney's wee brother

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    Am doin great, thanks :grin:
     
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  15. Benoit Blanc

    Benoit Blanc 1 of the top judges in Europe

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    Eduard Asslove, seems legit

    For almost 500 years the masses have been thoroughly deceived by a cosmic fairytale.

    A sphere where people on the other side live with their feet above their heads, were rain, snow and hail fall upwards and the sky is lower than the ground.
     
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  16. GroveRanger

    GroveRanger Well-Known Member

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    Christmas party in full swing Mr Kaiser?
     
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  17. Benoit Blanc

    Benoit Blanc 1 of the top judges in Europe

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    wrong forum muppet
     
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  18. Fridge Magnet

    Fridge Magnet Well-Known Member

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    I only smoke after making love.

    Twice a year if I'm lucky. :(
     
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  19. Gambol

    Gambol George Clooney's wee brother

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    Only a burd calls it "making love".

    Hullo, doll :grin:
     
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  20. Fridge Magnet

    Fridge Magnet Well-Known Member

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    Parp!
    please log in to view this image
     
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