Off Topic The SIR Kenny Dalglish Public House

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After a turbulent first season at Manchester United. David De Gea attempted suicide by jumping in front of a train.
Unfortunately it went straight between his legs. Well that does prove he's bigger donut than the one he was caught stealing and exposed as a tee-leaf.
 
Raheemthespeedmachine said:
After a turbulent first season at Manchester United. David De Gea attempted suicide by jumping in front of a train.
Unfortunately it went straight between his legs. Well that does prove he's bigger donut than the one he was caught stealing and exposed as a tee-leaf.
Click to expand...

Wrong thread. <ok>
 
An old married couple no sooner hit the pillows when the old man passes gas and says, 'Seven Points.'

His wife rolls over and says, 'What in the world was that?'

The old man replied, 'its fart football.'

...A few minutes later his wife lets one go and says, 'Touchdown, tie score...'

After about five minutes the old man lets another one go and says, 'Aha. I'm ahead 14 to 7.'

Not to be outdone the wife rips out another one and says, 'Touchdown, tie score.'

Five seconds go by and she lets out a little squeaker and says, 'Field goal, I lead 17 to 14.' Now the pressure is on the old man.

He refuses to get beaten by a woman, so he strains real hard. Since defeat is totally unacceptable, he gives it everything he's got, and accidentally ****s in the bed.

The wife says, 'What the hell was that?'

The old man says, 'Half time, switch sides'!



<party>
 
Dirtyfrank said:
Wehey! I can now add Frankie Boyle to people who've blocked me on twitter!
Click to expand...

I only have Stan Collymore that's blocked me. Purely because I called him hypocritical. He was criticising an ex-player who works in the media for making comments about an existing player and added that "he is only where he is now because he was a professional footballer", I merely pointed out that the same applies to him...BLOCKED!
 
Can't be arsed with twitter and don't know much about it, but perhaps "followers" means in the biblical sense. Like the followers of JC and Buddha, you have to be sycophantic and dote on their every utterance.
 
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