Off Topic The offical: Jokes THREAD

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I was in a pub playing darts when this nun walked in.. She asked me what I was playing.
'Well, it's darts ain't it?'' I replied.
'Can I have a go?' She asked.
'Sure,' I replied and handed her the darts.
The first one went straight into treble 20, second one straight into treble 20. Wow, she was some player. She threw the third dart. It was heading into treble 20, but hit the wire, rebounded back and ended up in her forehead.
I shouted out. 'One nun dead and eighty'.
 
A priest and a pilot were waiting in line at the Pearly Gates for St Peter.
St Peter had a brief chat with the pilot then gave him a gold halo and he entered heaven. Then St Peter moved onto the priest and gave him a wooden halo.
"Why does he get a get a gold halo whilst I only get a wooden one?" asked the priest.
"It's easy." St Peter replied "We reward by results. When you preached everyone fell asleep whereas when he flew everyone prayed."
 
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