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The man thread

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Captainchaos., Dec 15, 2016.

  1. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    I
    I'll only join a gym if I get a pensioner's discount and the vending machine dispenses ***s, beer and self lubricating fannies that will take a soft "un".
     
    #21
    TEL and salad fingers like this.
  2. Warmir Pouchov

    Warmir Pouchov Better than JPF

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    I don't know what I'm benching because my trainer has ****ed up my routine pre Xmas. Gone all body comp. Got me doing some weird high intensity ****. It is murdering me after not doing more than 6 reps for a month. Doing 12 reps of 60 for 5 sets. These are couple with another chest exercise and 2 quad legs for A exercises. Then it's more back and hams for B exercises. Alters to arms and legs on the other day. It's ****ing killing me. I was enjoying the bulking. So lactic. Chucked last night at end of session. You start off thinking Jesus these weights are light. Chest is the only thing that doesn't end up in complete burn to be honest.

    I like steak for breakfast like a proper bloke.

    I'd like to rim Jennifer Lawrence the filthy ****er. And scarlet johanssen
     
    #22
    Captainchaos. likes this.
  3. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    Cracking manly morning.
    Farting and belching, Bacon Sarnies and cans of coke.
    The quacks has just given me some 'roids', so I should be able to bench at least 500kg this evening with my left hand, after which two dozen bottle of Bud to wash down tonight's Steak.
     
    #23
  4. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    Good man.
    I'll bring you one of Obi's spare bra's when we next meet. <laugh>
     
    #24
  5. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    was it the one he left down at the beach

    download (2).jpg
     
    #25
    Obi Wan and J. J. McClure like this.
  6. General Lee Speaking

    General Lee Speaking Well-Known Member

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    Yes, all that's a myth but they will make you think everything in the world is **** and you'll start dishing out death threats to your work colleagues.
     
    #26
    J. J. McClure and Obi Wan like this.
  7. Blacker-than-Knight

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    I am 54 years old, I get out of bed, I don't take any tablets, I don't do any drugs, I am a fat ****er and don't really care, my doctor is really pissed off cause my blood pressure is normal, I look after me mam as her carer, drink beer and wine, bench press who cares, wine press ****ing A. Comment sponsored by Jacobs Creek.
     
    #27
  8. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace
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    <laugh>
     
    #28
    Warmir Pouchov likes this.
  9. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    Gymnasiums...... Playgrounds for the weak.
     
    #29
    Last edited: Dec 15, 2016
  10. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    please log in to view this image
     
    #30

  11. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace
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    I heard there had been Chaos on the tubes this week.
     
    #31
  12. fredor

    fredor Well-Known Member

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    It is not too long ago that I could easily pull the top off a tub of yogurt
     
    #32
  13. Captainchaos.

    Captainchaos. Well-Known Member

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    With or without face splash ??? I can never get it right
     
    #33
  14. Blacker-than-Knight

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    just to confirm you are talking about yoghurt?
     
    #34
    Captainchaos. and Warmir Pouchov like this.
  15. Captainchaos.

    Captainchaos. Well-Known Member

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    Absolutely

    I have the same issue with soup beans and spaghetti
     
    #35
  16. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

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    I love how non gym goers think that all gym going blokes stand around looking at each other's bellends tiddling up and down as they run and then chase each other into the showers.

    That's definitely not the case, you're not allowed to run in the changing rooms, the floor is too slippy.
     
    #36
  17. Captainchaos.

    Captainchaos. Well-Known Member

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    I don't change I just walk in train and walk out

    No nonesense
     
    #37
  18. Tel (they/them)

    Tel (they/them) Sucky’s Bailiff

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    That's not good enough, you should be running in and crawling out.
     
    #38
  19. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    A Real Man would wear a Xmas Jumper for going to the Gym.
     
    #39
  20. Captainchaos.

    Captainchaos. Well-Known Member

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    I don't do cardio I'm on s bulk mate
     
    #40

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