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Off Topic The 'Like' Brothel

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Albert's Chip Shop, Dec 27, 2014.

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  1. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    A teacher was teaching her class about the difference between right & wrong.
    "Let's take an example. If I were to get into a man's pocket & take his wallet with all his money, what would I be?"
    A little boy raises his hand and with a confident smile, says, "You'd be his wife!"
     
    #4021
    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  2. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  3. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    I didn't think that my uncle liked me but apparently he has left me a large building in his will.

    Does anyone know where Sod Hall is ?
     
    #4023
    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  4. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    I'm hoping that it's garlic . . . .
    please log in to view this image
     
    #4024
    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  5. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    Lent my mate 20 grand to get plastic surgery.

    Cannot recognise him now to get my money back.....
     
    #4025
    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  6. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  7. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  8. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    A MAN AND WOMAN WERE MARRIED FOR MANY YEARS.
    Whenever there a confrontation, yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout, "When I die, I'll dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!"
    Neighbors feared him. The old man liked the fact that he was feared.
    He died at the ripe old age of 98.
    After the burial, her neighbors, concerned for her safety, asked, "Aren't you afraid that he may indeed be able to dig his way out of the grave and haunt you for the rest of your life?"
    The wife said, "LET HIM DIG. I HAD HIM BURIED UPSIDE DOWN...AND I KNOW HE WON'T ASK FOR DIRECTIONS."
     
    #4028
    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  9. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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  10. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  11. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  12. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  13. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    I was just putting the cat out when the wife said, "Who the f*ck set the cat alight?
     
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    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  14. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  15. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    BREAKING NEWS!

    Engineers have just made a car that can run on parsley…
    Now they're hoping to make buses that run on thyme!
     
    #4035
    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  16. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    Last time I visited Blackpool I went on a donkey.

    It took me ages to get there.
     
    #4036
    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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  17. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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  18. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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  19. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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  20. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    So I went into my local workmen's café this morning and said: "Can I have a cold mug of tea, two bits of bacon so hard I can break a tooth, cold baked beans, two cold half cooked eggs and can you make sure the top comes off the salt and don't wash up the knife and fork".
    The woman serving says: "That sounds disgusting! There is no way we can do that!"
    I said: "You managed it yesterday!!"
     
    #4040
    kiwiqpr, Aug 11, 2025
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Page 202 of 204
: like better than rep, tag me up ladies, filthy like whores, I like a good like, like a rolling stone, kiwi was here, spank this like whore!, no f'ker likes kiwi's, kiwis watching you lot, LIKE KIWI

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