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Off Topic The dying Swan ~ Joke thread

Discussion in 'Cardiff City' started by DaiJones, Sep 18, 2018.

Page 86 of 326
  1. clingo

    clingo Well-Known Member

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    No, no Roger.
    I think you misread. It's not a winking festival!
    Easy to get vowels mixed up. I do it all the time.
     
    #1701
    clingo, Aug 29, 2022
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  2. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    bugger that's specsavers in the morning then
     
    #1702
    Makemstine Roger, Aug 29, 2022
    clingo likes this.
  3. clingo

    clingo Well-Known Member

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    They say that too much winking can affect the eyes.
    Now where did I put my glasses?
     
    #1703
    clingo, Aug 29, 2022
    Makemstine Roger likes this.
  4. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    your lucky my wink has a stutter

    i wondered why certain types of men tried to follow me
     
    #1704
    Makemstine Roger, Aug 29, 2022
    clingo likes this.
  5. clingo

    clingo Well-Known Member

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    <laugh><laugh><laugh>
     
    #1705
    clingo, Aug 29, 2022
    irishbluebird and Makemstine Roger like this.
  6. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #1706
    Makemstine Roger, Aug 29, 2022
    BluefromBridgend likes this.

  7. FrankfurterBlue

    FrankfurterBlue Well-Known Member

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    Oh dear God!!!
     
    #1707
    FrankfurterBlue, Aug 29, 2022
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  8. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    what don't tell me he's had a nibble as well
     
    #1708
    Makemstine Roger, Aug 29, 2022
    FrankfurterBlue and BluefromBridgend like this.
  9. DaiJones

    DaiJones Well-Known Member

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    What’s better than roses on your piano?



    Tulips on your organ.
     
    #1709
    DaiJones, Aug 31, 2022
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  10. DaiJones

    DaiJones Well-Known Member

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    I bought a box of condoms earlier today.

    The cashier asked if I’d like a bag.

    I said “no, I’ll just turn the lights off.”
     
    #1710
    DaiJones, Aug 31, 2022
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  11. DaiJones

    DaiJones Well-Known Member

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    Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.
     
    #1711
    DaiJones, Aug 31, 2022
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  12. DaiJones

    DaiJones Well-Known Member

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    What’s the difference between your wife and your job?


    After five years, your job will still suck.
     
    #1712
    DaiJones, Aug 31, 2022
    Makemstine Roger likes this.
  13. blueturk the cat

    blueturk the cat Well-Known Member

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    I shagged a Chinese girl in a lift once …. I was f*cking Wong on so many levels
     
    #1713
    blueturk the cat, Sep 1, 2022
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  14. Masky

    Masky Well-Known Member

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    I shagged a Chinese girl against a chimney once, it was fluggin Glate! :emoticon-0103-cool:

    MASKY OF LLANDAFF
     
    #1714
    Masky, Sep 1, 2022
    Makemstine Roger, DaiJones and blueturk the cat like this.
  15. blueturk the cat

    blueturk the cat Well-Known Member

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    886F8314-8523-4A63-8FAC-4E0BBFA559C1.jpeg Old but gold :emoticon-0102-bigsm
     
    #1715
    blueturk the cat, Sep 1, 2022
    Makemstine Roger, DaiJones, irishbluebird and 2 others like this.
  16. ccfcremotesupport

    ccfcremotesupport Well-Known Member

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    Red sky at night, shepherd's delight.
    Red sky in the morning, Port Talbot on fire.
     
    #1716
    ccfcremotesupport, Sep 1, 2022
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  17. DaiJones

    DaiJones Well-Known Member

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    She was offered big money for them to make a cast of her face, I can't see why.








    main-qimg-bb4b445c4b20729abbca5808ccd88479-lq.jpg
     
    #1717
    DaiJones, Sep 2, 2022
    Makemstine Roger and irishbluebird like this.
  18. BluefromBridgend

    BluefromBridgend Well-Known Member

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    Why is the Jaws theme in my head?
     
    #1718
    BluefromBridgend, Sep 2, 2022
    Makemstine Roger, irishbluebird and DaiJones like this.
  19. DaiJones

    DaiJones Well-Known Member

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    Police toilet stolen,

    Cops have nothing to go on.
     
    #1719
    DaiJones, Sep 2, 2022
    Makemstine Roger, irishbluebird and ccfcremotesupport like this.
  20. DaiJones

    DaiJones Well-Known Member

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    I was kidnapped by mime artists.


    They done unspeakable things to me.
     
    #1720
    DaiJones, Sep 2, 2022
    Makemstine Roger and irishbluebird like this.
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