Paddy and Murphy come across a woman whose bike has a flat tyre... Murphy leaves Paddy to help her, and goes on his way. A few minutes later, Paddy passes Murphy on the woman's bike. "What the feck happened"? asks Murphy. "Well, I fixed her bike and be jaysus she takes her ****in knickers off, lies on the ground and says, 'take what you want big boy!", so I took the bike.'' "Good on ye'' says Murphy, ''I'm sure the f**king knickers wouldn't fit ya anyway" You've just got to love the Irish
My friends set me up on a blind date. We met in the pub. She was tall and blonde and stunning. We had a few drinks then went to a club. Coming out I said to her "You're beautiful. Would you object to having sex on a first date". She said "I haven't done it before" I said "Are you a virgin?". She said "No you silly bastard. I've never objected before!
