Socks. Slippers. A David Beckham smelly set. A Tag Heaur Aquaracer 500. A corkscrew holder. A bottle of red wine. A mug with dogs printed on it filled with with chocolate Santa's. Andrew Flintoff's second autobiography. I wouldn't mind but the slippers weren't bought for me. They were for my lad, he's basically refused to be seen dead in them so I've been lumbered with the bastards. I've just got back from 3 days at the out laws and I've put loads of weight on already. Balls to it, think I'll have a Baileys.
I like how you just casually throw that in the middle hoping no one will notice. You'll get the book thrown at you for that.
I dunno i thought we were alright about bikes now. Cyclists are still ****s like but the bikes themselves...
Some poor quality lambswool slippers because apparently Emu arn't currently making Gents size 9. A likely story. A Spa day, but only at The Marriott, Gateshead ffs. I'll wear a hat and scarf on the way in. A flat cap and a bottle of Radgie Gadgie. This was my Secret Santa present from work. Sarky Bastards. Socks, books, toffees, generic chocolate. How clichéd, it's a wonder I didn't get a ****ing satsuma and a set of cheap colouring pencils. Nah, only joking. My best present was seeing the smile on my little girl's face when I casually tossed her one final present out of my pocket after we'd all finished opening everything. Car keys for her first car. I've been looking forward to doing that since she was about 5. I'm the best Dad ever now and I've got the mug to prove it. Oh and Tentotwo and Cillit Bang's news on here. Great news both.
She's a girl so yeah, she did. Me? I got something in my eye at just that moment. Sod's law, I guess.
Some expensive socks that do something to your feet. Undercrackers that, well, hold me knackers up Lynx something, with a laptop case in the box. I don't have a laptop but thanks mam City top with my name and the number 1 on it. Yes I know. 3 daughters and they just don't know. I will wear the ****er though so it's all good. I am also number 1. FACT. Some ****ing amazing slippers. Made by some company called Homeys. Got them from Office apparently. Chinos from Next. Best fit trousers I ever get them bastards. Old Spice Few tops Best part of day was watching the 3 year old granddaughter open her stuff though. She's frigging awesome. Absolutely everything she opened was the best thing ever. I was slightly put out though when I offered to help take stuff out of the boxes for her and all 3 of mine said "NO DAD, remember that time you broke the head off Emma's doll when she was 4". They never forget. They never forgive.
Andriod box First rules of Football book Robert Louis Stevenson Tales of the South Seas Calvin Klien aftershave and deodorant 17 bottles of beer Bottle of Morgan Spiced Gold Half season pass
