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The Christian Thread of Lengths and Gapes

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by gas, Jan 14, 2014.

  1. gas

    gas ACCOUNT DELETED
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    But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.

    James 1:6
     
    #81
  2. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    This is true, if you don't believe it, think about this...when did you last hear of anyone being haunted by a dinosaur? See, proof in deed they never existed.
     
    #82
  3. RAVENBLACK

    RAVENBLACK Well-Known Member

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    evolution is a load of bollocks as well.

    Darwin believed in God for ****s sake.
     
    #83
  4. Moses

    Moses Well-Known Member

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    And he said, Who art thou, Lord? And the Lord said, I am Jesus whom thou persecutest: it is hard for thee to kick against the pricks.

    Acts 9:5
     
    #84
  5. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    When they're translating from dead languages how come they make up new words and write it in a way nobody has ever spoken? Is it all the begating?
     
    #85
  6. Moses

    Moses Well-Known Member

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    It's all about the subtext Hull. St Paul was a well renowned misogynist and was fairly homophobic Persecutest was just his way of saying how much he fancied St Timothy's younger brother Percy. He clearly states that he is the cutest, but is clearly in denial. It's often thought the real source of his blindness was an overindulgence in onanistic activities concerning wee Percy.
     
    #86
  7. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    A day without learning. <ok>

    So was Percy there when Jesus wrecked the church jumble? I bet that's where they got the phrase about taking a piss "point Percy at the poor selling".
     
    #87
  8. gas

    gas ACCOUNT DELETED
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    But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth.

    Acts 1:8
     
    #88
  9. A.L.D.O 4.1

    A.L.D.O 4.1 1 of the top defendants in Europe

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    one minute I'm a leper with trade the next minute im y livelyhoods gone , not so much as a by-your-leave. "You're cured mate"

    Bloody dogooder .

    Brian 2:6
     
    #89
  10. gas

    gas ACCOUNT DELETED
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    But You, O Lord, are a God full of compassion, and gracious, Longsuffering and abundant in mercy and truth.

    Psalms 86:15
     
    #90

  11. FosseFilberto

    FosseFilberto Pizzeria Superiore and some ...
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    Look not upon your inheritance as an unbalanced collection of odorous effluent, but instead embrace the challenge in front of thee knowing that thy certain failure will surely enhance the blinding light of mine own legend.

    Alexander to the Moyesians 1:7:13
     
    #91
  12. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    Acts 20:9

    As Paul spoke on and on, a young man named Eutychus, sitting on the windowsill, became very drowsy. Finally, he fell sound asleep and dropped three stories to his death below.
     
    #92
  13. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    Deuteronomy 14:21

    Do not eat anything you find already dead. You may give it to an alien living in any of your towns and he may eat it, or you may sell it to a foreigner.
     
    #93
  14. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    Deut. 23:1

    No man whose testicles have been crushed or whose organ has been cut off may become a member of the Assembly of God.
     
    #94
  15. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    Genesis 16:8

    And he said &#8220;Hagar, Sarai&#8217;s slave girl, where have you come from and where are you going?&#8221; She answered, &#8220;I&#8217;m running away from Sarai, my mistress.&#8221; The angel of the Lord said to her, &#8220;Go back to your mistress and submit to ill treatment at her hands.&#8221;
     
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  16. DMD

    DMD Eh?
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    Ezekiel 23:19-20

    "Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses."
     
    #96
  17. gas

    gas ACCOUNT DELETED
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    Careless words stab like a sword, but wise words bring healing. The Lord hates those who tell lies but is pleased with those who keep their promises.

    Proverbs 12:18-22
     
    #97
  18. Gambol

    Gambol George Clooney's wee brother

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    What if I promise to lie?
     
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  19. FosseFilberto

    FosseFilberto Pizzeria Superiore and some ...
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    ... you get carelessly stabbed up the arse with a sword ...
     
    #99
  20. gas

    gas ACCOUNT DELETED
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    Christ had no sin, but God made him become sin so that in Christ we could become right with God.

    2 Corinthians 5:21
     
    #100

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