Off Topic The Burly Arms

What would you know about the eighties or jokes

I dont write them by the way I just steal them

 

Amanda is proper fit

But it aint natural like, she spends bare cash on that ****

 

Fire lit

Sat chilling, monged out on tramadol and rum cake.

happy days

 

Knock it on the head please mate.

 

Douglas? **** jokes in **** jokes thread

Mornin btw mate

 

Eventually someone has the balls to say what we have all been thinking for the last few months

 

Let's get the thread back on thread then, what the **** is everyone's weekend plans?

I'm starting the weekend with a nut shriveling sea dip at four o clock, followed by a couple of neat rums then home to light the fire and get cosily pickled.

Got basics lock down DIY and **** over the weekend, with a run and bike ride thrown in here and there for good measure.

My God how I miss begin able to play a round of golf though.

Would start some weekend threads again but don't want to upset @Spurlock

 

i quite like duggies **** jokes thanks

 

Out of action with a bad back atm.

****er because I can’t get out on the bike, there’s also a nice little 3ft wave at my local. Can’t even get in the sauna coz the pool is closed.

The opioids are nice though and at least I can watch the footie on a Saturday for a change coz I won’t be working.

what has @Spurlock got against the weekend threads anyway ?

 

Back injuries are a ****er, so you have my commiserations. My gammy leg is causing me grief this week, so I’ve also reached for the opioids, every cloud

 

Lol yeah, about the only time I have any sympathy for Heroin addicts.

Back pain is a ****er, literally every move makes it spasm. It's an old injury which flares up every now and again, so I know it will pass.

What's up with your gammy leg ? Maybe we should start a Crocks corner thread.

 

My knee ligaments are bent out of shape and can’t be corrected due to bone damage, and my hip is also ****ed. Causes me grief in spells, can usually shut it out with paracetamol, but at the moment it’s quite bad, so I’m dropping the odd opioid.

 

I took a full force impact by a 12.5 tonne delivery truck in my 20's and my Pelvis is misaligned as a result. It doesn't make me walk like John Wayne, but it does mean I get nerve impingement if I pull any muscles in my lower back. So it's sciatica and back spasms which is a fun combo.

Got some Tramadol left over from the last episode, so like you say, every cloud and all that

 

Absolutely brass ****ing monkey's in the sea this evening. Ridiculous.

Still can barely feel my finger tips.

Was in for ten minutes, anything beyond would have been hypothermia territory.

 

Mrs had her first bout of Sciatica and has been in agony every morning. Doctor prescribed stretching exercises, naproxen and amitriptyline. Just read that the last one is an antidepressant so hopefully that will also get her over the fact that I told her it could be due to the amount of weight she has put on over lockdown.

 

at the last bit, not the sciatica.

Feel for her mate, it’s fukin agony. Thankfully this time hasn’t been too bad. I’ve had it so bad in the past where the nerve impingement sends the wrong signals to muscles in my leg and there’s no resistance in my quad.

Literally go to stand up and the muscle doesn’t work and you fall over in a heap. Scary stuff.

I stretch every day since the injury though, my missus is a yoga nut, so she’s shown me a few good back, hamstring and core muscle stretches.

 

Gonna have a beer.

 

Might join you actually.

Last night I discovered that you should stick to only one spirit of an evening.

Had a single malt and a neat rum down the beach.

Couple of rum and ginger beers after, couple of gin and ginger beers after that, when the rum ran out.

Felt like ****e this morning tbh.