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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15821
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15822
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15823
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15824
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Deaf couple get married and during the first week of marriage, they find that they are unable to communicate in the bedroom when they turn off the lights (because they can't see each other using sign language).
    After several nights of fumbling around and misunderstandings, the Wife proposes a solution.
    "Honey." She signs. "Why don't we agree on some simple signals? For instance, at night, if you want to have Sex with me, reach over and squeeze my left Breast one time.
    If you don't want to have Sex, reach over and squeeze my right Breast one time."
    The husband thinks this is a great idea and signs back to his Wife. "Great idea! Now if you want to have Sex with me, reach over and pull on my Penis one time. And if you don't want to have Sex, reach over and pull on my Penis fifty times."
     
    #15825
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Hecklers anonymous meeting tonight 7pm.

    Bring your own boos.
     
    #15826
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    This morning, I coughed up a pawn, a bishop, and a rook.

    I must have a chess infection......
     
    #15827
  8. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    dont believe you it was 56 a day the freebies you get from the distillery makes anyone jealous
     
    #15828
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15829
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  10. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    give him a name
     
    #15830
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    The fact that Jellyfish have survived for 650 million years despite not having brains gives hope to many people.
     
    #15831
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  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Chicken George ?
     
    #15832
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  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    My local cafe' has started selling golf equipment.

    So I bought, 2 tees and a sandwedge....
     
    #15833
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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I used to date a girl with one leg, who worked in a brewery.

    She was in charge of the HOPS...
     
    #15834
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  15. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    He wont like that will our Didds but that is Brilliant
     
    #15835
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15836
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    An American, an Englishman and a Scotsman are eating breakfast with their wives...

    The American says to his wife: "Please pass me the honey, honey"

    Then the Englishman requests: "Please pass me the sugar, sugar," to his wife.

    The Scotsman thinks for a second, then bickers "Pass me the milk, ya cow!"
     
    #15837
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  18. Wooperts_duck

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    #15838
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  19. Wooperts_duck

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    #15839
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  20. Wooperts_duck

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    #15840
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