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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #1541
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 7, 2017
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    #1542
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 7, 2017
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  3. Wooperts_duck

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    #1543
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  4. Wooperts_duck

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    #1544
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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    #1545
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Barclay"s are apparently "Fluent in Finance."
    Well, that"s fantastic.
    Its just a shame none of the f*cking Indians that answer their phones are fluent in English.
     
    #1546
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  7. Wooperts_duck

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    George wakes up in hospital after a serious operation.
    "I have good news and bad news," says the doctor.
    "The good news is that we managed to save your testicles."
    "Thank God," says George.
    "And what"s the bad news?"
    The doctor replies, "they"re in a bag under your pillow."
     
    #1547
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  8. Wooperts_duck

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    #1548
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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    #1549
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  10. Wooperts_duck

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    Annoy SpecSavers staff by wandering up to their counter squinting your eyes whilst looking up behind them.

    When they ask if they can help you say, "Big Mac meal please!"
     
    #1550
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Be careful, there's a gangster going around pulling up the back of peoples pants, "I think his name is Wedgie Kray."
     
    #1551
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  12. Wooperts_duck

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    I asked my boss, "What do you want me to do with this 6 metre roll of bubble wrap?"

    He replied, "Just pop it in the corner."

    4 f*cking hours it took me!
     
    #1552
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  13. Wooperts_duck

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    My blonde wife and I got into an argument because I accused her of being stupid.

    Eventually she jumped up out of her chair and yelled, "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't walk out that door!"

    I replied, "The plane hasn't landed yet."
     
    #1553
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  14. Wooperts_duck

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    It was in the news the otherday that Alexis Sanchez is unsure over his Arsenal future and has refused to rule out a move to Bayern Munich.

    Today, fire crews were spotted at his country mansion tackling a blaze.

    Police suspect Arsene.
     
    #1554
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  15. Wooperts_duck

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    #1555
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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    Conservatives 319 seats,

    Labour 261 seats,

    SNP 34 seats,

    Lib Dems 12 seats,

    UKIP 0 seats,

    Manchester City 20,000 empty seats.
     
    #1556
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  17. Wooperts_duck

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    "Can you get some bleach and some washing powder whilst you're out?" My wife asked.

    "Can you not wait until you've opened your birthday presents?" I replied.
     
    #1557
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  18. Wooperts_duck

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    Liverpool have announced that they have signed 91 year old Dick Van Dyke on a 3 year contract to make up for missing out on his cousin Virgil.........

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    #1558
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 9, 2017
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  19. Wooperts_duck

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    #1559
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 11, 2017
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    #1560
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 11, 2017
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Page 78 of 834
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

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