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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Today I finally passed my driving test. I'm delighted.

    Now I can go dogging.

    Without my parents having to give me a lift!!.
     
    #15101
    Wooperts_duck, May 21, 2024
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15102
    Wooperts_duck, May 21, 2024
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15103
    Wooperts_duck, May 21, 2024
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15104
    Wooperts_duck, May 21, 2024
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15105
    Wooperts_duck, May 22, 2024
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15106
    Wooperts_duck, May 22, 2024
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15107
    Wooperts_duck, May 22, 2024
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15108
    Wooperts_duck, May 22, 2024
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15109
    Wooperts_duck, May 22, 2024
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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15110
    Wooperts_duck, May 23, 2024
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15111
    Wooperts_duck, May 23, 2024
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  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    How do you get a fat lass into bed.
    .
    .
    .
    Piece of cake
     
    #15112
    Wooperts_duck, May 23, 2024
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  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15113
    Wooperts_duck, May 23, 2024
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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15114
    Wooperts_duck, May 24, 2024
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  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15115
    Wooperts_duck, May 24, 2024
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A man and a woman who had never met before found themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a Trans-continental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, they were both very tired and fell asleep quickly.....He in the upper bunk and she in the lower. At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and gently woke the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
    "I have a better idea," she replied. "Just for tonight, let's pretend we're married."
    "Wow! That's a great idea!" he exclaimed.
    "Good," she replied. "Get your own friggin blanket."
    After a moment of silence, he farted.
     
    #15116
    Wooperts_duck, May 24, 2024
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    My dad always said "When one door closes, another one opens"

    Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker
     
    #15117
    Wooperts_duck, May 25, 2024
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  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I was taking a **** in the train toilet this morning . When some guy knocked on the door
    He said, “can I see your ticket please?”
    “Not right now” I shouted, “I’m taking a ****”
    He said, I don’t believe you, can you pass it under the door?
    “No problem” I said, sliding it under, “The yellow bits are Sweetcorn.”
     
    #15118
    Wooperts_duck, May 25, 2024
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  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A bus full of blind people went on a day trip to Skegness. Halfway there the driver pulls up at a pub for a piss and a quick drink. To keep the blind people occupied he puts a bell in a football and leaves them outside to have a kick about. Just as he's settling down to drink his pint of coke a fella comes running in and says " Who's looking after that blind group outside "?
    The drivers says he is and what seems to be the problem. The bloke replies, " You best come outside now, they're kicking the fu*k out of the Morris dancers "
     
    #15119
    Wooperts_duck, May 25, 2024
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #15120
    Wooperts_duck, May 25, 2024
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Page 756 of 764
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

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