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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #14341
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 7, 2023
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  2. Wooperts_duck

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    #14342
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 7, 2023
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #14343
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 7, 2023
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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #14344
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 7, 2023
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Five quid says he's playing "Money for Nothing"......................
     
    #14345
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 7, 2023
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he
    asked about his bill, and the barber replied, 'I cannot accept money
    from you, I'm doing community service this week.'
    The florist was pleased and left the shop.
    When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a
    'thank you' card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.
    Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill,
    the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from you, I'm doing
    community service this week.' The cop was happy and left the shop.
    The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a 'thank
    you' card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door.
    Then a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to
    pay his bill, the barber again replied, 'I cannot accept money from
    you. I'm doing community service this week.' The Member of Parliament
    was very happy and left the shop.
    The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen
    Members of Parliament lined up waiting for a free haircut.
    And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between
    the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it.....
     
    #14346
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 7, 2023
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  7. Wooperts_duck

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    #14347
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 7, 2023
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  8. Wooperts_duck

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    #14348
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 7, 2023
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  9. Wooperts_duck

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    #14349
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 8, 2023
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  10. Wooperts_duck

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    #14350
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 8, 2023
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    When a recipe tells you to separate 2 eggs, how far is acceptable?

    I've just put one on a train to Aberdeen....
     
    #14351
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 9, 2023
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  12. Wooperts_duck

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    #14352
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 9, 2023
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  13. Wooperts_duck

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    #14353
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 9, 2023
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  14. Wooperts_duck

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    #14354
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 9, 2023
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  15. Wooperts_duck

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    #14355
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 11, 2023
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  16. Wooperts_duck

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    #14356
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 11, 2023
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  17. Wooperts_duck

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    #14357
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 11, 2023
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  18. Wooperts_duck

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    #14358
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 11, 2023
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  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    The woman opposite the road from me called me a pervert earlier, I don't know why!

    Knowing she likes bird watching I asked her if she'd like to come over and have a look at my twelve finches......
     
    #14359
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 11, 2023
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I was in a Spain themed pub last night. Before they served me they wanted to know my name, DOB, height, weight, job description etc.

    I said look I just want a drink not the Spanish Inn quisition.
     
    #14360
    Wooperts_duck, Dec 11, 2023
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Page 718 of 830
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

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