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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A guy goes to the doctor and says: 'Doctor, I'm
    getting married next week, but I have had unprotected sex
    a couple of times lately. Before our marriage, I'd
    like to know if I have an STD; could you do a test for me?'
    'Sure', the doctor says, 'but the result
    of such a test takes 3 weeks, so it will not be in time for your
    marriage'
    'Oh dear', the guy says, 'What should I do?'
    'Well, the doctor replies, 'Perhaps I know something.
    You go to the meadows just outside the city, and wait till
    the sheep have gathered around you. Then you drop your pants
    and wait to see what happens... If the sheep just smell your dick
    and walk away, there is a problem. However, if they take
    your dick in their mouths and start sucking it, you're
    OK!'
    After a few weeks the doctor runs into the guy. 'And...',
    he asks, 'can I congratulate you on your marriage?'
    'No', the guy says, 'I've become a shepherd!'
     
    #9461
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 12, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and San Diego like this.
  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9462
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 12, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and San Diego like this.
  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9463
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 13, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego, Gordon Armstrong and 1 other person like this.
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9464
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 14, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9465
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 14, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9466
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 14, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  7. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    #9467
    Gordon Armstrong, Sep 15, 2020
    Wooperts_duck and San Diego like this.
  8. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    IMG-20200915-WA0000.jpg
     
    #9468
    Gordon Armstrong, Sep 15, 2020
    Didley Squat, San Diego and UTRs like this.
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Hooked up with a Tinder date last week after exaggerating a bit to get myself more likes. We got back to her flat and she said "f.uck me with your twelve inches and make me hurt!"

    So we had sex four times and I said her cushions didn't go with her curtains.
     
    #9469
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 15, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9470
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 15, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Didley Squat, San Diego and 1 other person like this.

  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    The man who invented the taser has died...

    His friends are stunned...
     
    #9471
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 15, 2020
    Didley Squat, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9472
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 15, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  13. Didley Squat

    Didley Squat Well-Known Member

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    That dear lass has more crack than a Cuban drug lord.
     
    #9473
    Didley Squat, Sep 16, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Gordon Armstrong, San Diego and 1 other person like this.
  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9474
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 16, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9475
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 16, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Gordon Armstrong and San Diego like this.
  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9476
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 16, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Didley Squat and San Diego like this.
  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9477
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 17, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Didley Squat and San Diego like this.
  18. Didley Squat

    Didley Squat Well-Known Member

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    That reminds me ................ where did l put my dentures?
     
    #9478
    Didley Squat, Sep 17, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Wooperts_duck and San Diego like this.
  19. Gordon Armstrong

    Gordon Armstrong Just another S.A.F.C. fan
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    IMG-20200917-WA0000.jpg
     
    #9479
    Gordon Armstrong, Sep 17, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Wooperts_duck, San Diego and 1 other person like this.
  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #9480
    Wooperts_duck, Sep 18, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
Page 474 of 748
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

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