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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

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  1. Taffvalerowdy

    Taffvalerowdy Well-Known Member

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    upload_2020-5-8_12-47-23.jpeg
     
    #8501
    Taffvalerowdy, May 8, 2020
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8502
    Wooperts_duck, May 8, 2020
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    At the store was an X on the floor by the register for me to stand.

    I've seen too many Road Runner cartoons to fall for that crap
     
    #8503
    Wooperts_duck, May 8, 2020
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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8504
    Wooperts_duck, May 8, 2020
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8505
    Wooperts_duck, May 8, 2020
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8506
    Wooperts_duck, May 8, 2020
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8507
    Wooperts_duck, May 8, 2020
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Went to library to get a book on lubricants, they directed me to the non friction section .
     
    #8508
    Wooperts_duck, May 8, 2020
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I woke up with a face full of rice.

    I must've fallen asleep as soon as my head hit the pilau.....
     
    #8509
    Wooperts_duck, May 8, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Gordon Armstrong, San Diego and 1 other person like this.
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8510
    Wooperts_duck, May 8, 2020
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8511
    Wooperts_duck, May 9, 2020
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  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8512
    Wooperts_duck, May 9, 2020
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  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8513
    Wooperts_duck, May 9, 2020
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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    "My friend doesn’t like to talk about his psoriasis.

    He’d rather just sweep it under the carpet."
     
    #8514
    Wooperts_duck, May 10, 2020
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  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8515
    Wooperts_duck, May 10, 2020
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8516
    Wooperts_duck, May 10, 2020
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #8517
    Wooperts_duck, May 10, 2020
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  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    My weight loss goal is simple.

    I just want to lay on the beach without having marine biologists pouring buckets of water over me.
     
    #8518
    Wooperts_duck, May 10, 2020
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  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    A group of primary school infants, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to Cheltenham races to see and learn about thoroughbred horses.

    When it was time to take the children to the toilet, it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.

    The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's toilet when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal..

    Having no choice, she went inside, helped the boys with their underpants, and began hoisting the boys up, one by one, holding their willies to direct the flow away from their clothes.

    As she lifted one, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring, the teacher said, 'You must be in year four.'

    "No, love," he replied. "I'm riding Silver Arrow in the 2.15"
     
    #8519
    Wooperts_duck, May 10, 2020
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I was in Turkey on holiday and came across one of those Turkish bath houses. They shaved with a solid, steel stone-ground razor from below the neckline, inside the ears, snipped out nose hairs, waxed off chest hairs and plucked all the hairs out of the arse crack, all finished off with a moustache trim and alcohol rub. Honestly, the wife's never looked so good!
     
    #8520
    Wooperts_duck, May 10, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
Page 426 of 838
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

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