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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4861
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego, BluefromBridgend and 1 other person like this.
  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4862
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4863
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    When I went to lunch today, I noticed an old lady sitting on a park bench sobbing her eyes out. I stopped and asked her what was wrong. She said, "I have a 22 year old husband at home. He makes love to me every morning and then gets up and makes me pancakes, fresh fruit and freshly ground coffee."

    I said, "Well, then why are you crying?"

    She said, "He makes me homemade soup for lunch and my favorite brownies and then makes love to me for half the afternoon".

    I said, "Well, why are you crying?"

    She said, "For dinner he makes me a gourmet meal with wine and my favorite dessert and then makes love to me until 2:00 a.m.

    I ask again, "Well, why in the world would you be crying?"

    She said, "I can't remember where I live!".
     
    #4864
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4865
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4866
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.

  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4867
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    I was shocked to hear the Home Secretary say that Britain's prison population has been ballooning for the past ten years.

    Has the world gone mad? Those people are there to be punished, not to be given an experience that most law abiding citizens can only dream of.
     
    #4868
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    My wife got this from Aldi. I sent her back to get the latest version.

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    #4869
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4870
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    The inventor of the snooze button has passed away.

    His funeral will take place tomorrow at 8:00am, 8:06am, 8:11am, 8:13am, and 8:14am
     
    #4871
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 28, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4872
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 29, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4873
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 29, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4874
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 29, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4875
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 29, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Will i am Shakespeare

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    #4876
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 29, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4877
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 31, 2018
    Makemstine Roger likes this.
  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Bloke just knocked on my door.

    I opened it and he was about 3ft 3"tall.

    I said "who are you?"

    He replied "I'm the meter man"
     
    #4878
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 31, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4879
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 31, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4880
    Wooperts_duck, Oct 31, 2018
    Makemstine Roger, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
Page 244 of 835
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

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