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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4141
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 1, 2018
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4142
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 1, 2018
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  3. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    For goodness sake, it's 2018...
    Surely we should have closed the #genderpaygap between all 9,630 genders by now?!
     
    #4143
    kiwiqpr, Aug 2, 2018
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  4. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #4144
    kiwiqpr, Aug 2, 2018
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  5. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #4145
    kiwiqpr, Aug 2, 2018
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  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Another utterly crap birthday party at my brother's house yesterday.

    I know he's a Bomb Disposal Technician, but does it really take 4 hours to open each present?
     
    #4146
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 2, 2018
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    • A woman was breast feeding her baby, when she noticed the window cleaner watching her.
    • Indignantly, she said, "what do you think you"re staring at?"
    • He replied, apologetically, "when I was a baby, I was bottle fed so I was just fascinated."
    • The woman says, "well, baby"s had enough but there"s some left if you want to find out what it"s like."
    • The window cleaner climbed in through the window and started to feed.
    • After a short time, the woman realised that she was becoming aroused and she asked, "would you like a little bit of some thing else?"
    • He replied, "have you got a rusk?"
     
    #4147
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    • Why is the bible like a penis?

    • You get it forced down your throat by a priest.
     
    #4148
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Did you know that the safest seats to sit in on a aeroplane are located behind the wings.

    Unless you're flying with RyanAir, their safest seats are located in their departure lounge!
     
    #4149
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    Any girls in Liverpool lost an eyebrow?

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    #4150
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    BBC News: An Indian builder has fallen through a roof at a Lionel Richie concert.

    A spokesman said "The last thing I saw was Dan Singh on the ceiling."
     
    #4151
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  12. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    #4152
    kiwiqpr, Aug 3, 2018
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  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4153
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4154
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4155
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    You know when you're having a poo then suddenly realise that there is no bog roll so you have to get up and do that waddle to get a new roll?...

    Well ....... I'm nearly at Tesco..!!!
     
    #4156
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4157
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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  18. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    Britain is bracing itself for a marmalade famine after #Brexit. With tariffs imposed the price of oranges from the EU will soar, pricing out the average housewife/husband from from purchasing the fruity preserve. They really didn't know what they were voting for.pic.twitter.com/zFttUFyNIL
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    #4158
    kiwiqpr, Aug 3, 2018
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  19. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    After #Brexit, Britain will no longer see Spanish omlettes on the menu. Outside of the single market and customs union, the Brits will be unable to source eggs from Spanish chickens. This will leave them with only regular British omlettes, which of course are completely different
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    #4159
    kiwiqpr, Aug 3, 2018
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member Staff Member

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    #4160
    Wooperts_duck, Aug 3, 2018
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Page 208 of 835
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

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