1. Log in now to remove adverts - no adverts at all to registered members!

The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

Page 192 of 834
  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    Even Ronaldo needs a hero......

    please log in to view this image
     
    #3821
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 24, 2018
    San Diego, kiwiqpr, Didley Squat and 1 other person like this.
  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    Even Ronaldo needs a hero.......

    please log in to view this image
     
    #3822
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 24, 2018
    San Diego, kiwiqpr and Didley Squat like this.
  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    please log in to view this image
     
    #3823
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 24, 2018
    San Diego, kiwiqpr, Didley Squat and 1 other person like this.
  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    Finally, the 2018 edition of "Understanding Women" has been released. Vol. 2 follows shortly.

    please log in to view this image
     
    #3824
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 24, 2018
    San Diego, kiwiqpr, Didley Squat and 1 other person like this.
  5. Kittenish

    Kittenish Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2017
    Messages:
    22,181
    Likes Received:
    52,461
    Maybe you should all read it..can you read? :emoticon-0140-rofl::emoticon-0109-kiss:
     
    #3825
    Kittenish, Jun 25, 2018
    Gordon Armstrong, Didley Squat, San Diego and 2 others like this.
  6. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    Don't interrupt me, I was half way through it. I wish it included pictures.........:)
     
    #3826
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 25, 2018
    Kittenish, Gordon Armstrong, Didley Squat and 2 others like this.
  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    • Teacher asks the kids in her class what their fathers did for a living.
    • "Mary, what does your dad do?"
    • "He"s a doctor, miss."
    • "Joe, what does your dad do?"
    • "He"s a pilot, miss."
    • "Billy, what"s your dad do?"
    • "My dad"s dead, miss."
    • "Oh Billy, I"m so sorry............what did he do before he died?"
    • "He turned purple, farted and fell on the dog, miss."
     
    #3827
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 25, 2018
    Gordon Armstrong, Didley Squat, San Diego and 1 other person like this.
  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    please log in to view this image
     
    #3828
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 25, 2018
    Gordon Armstrong, Didley Squat, kiwiqpr and 1 other person like this.
  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    That’s Poland out of the World Cup then.

    As a mark of respect all car washes will be closed in the UK for three days of mourning.
     
    #3829
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 25, 2018
    Didley Squat, Gordon Armstrong, kiwiqpr and 1 other person like this.
  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    please log in to view this image
     
    #3830
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 25, 2018
    Didley Squat, San Diego, Gordon Armstrong and 1 other person like this.

  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    please log in to view this image
     
    #3831
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 26, 2018
    San Diego, Gordon Armstrong, Didley Squat and 1 other person like this.
  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    please log in to view this image
     
    #3832
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 26, 2018
    San Diego, Gordon Armstrong, Didley Squat and 1 other person like this.
  13. Didley Squat

    Didley Squat Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2012
    Messages:
    28,086
    Likes Received:
    66,454
    Why not migrate to Australia?

    Illegal immigrants Welcome!
    Free health check to all illegal immigrants.
    Free Govt payments to all illegals, regardless of colour, race or creed.
    Free Housing and food if you qualify.

    To qualify.....
    You must be an illegal immigrant.
    You must be uneducated.
    You must carry diseases.
    You must hate your new adopted country.
    You must not integrate with the Australian people.
    You must be prepared to not to ever work again.

    If you fit this stringent criteria, please phone.... 1800NEWAUSSIES
     
    #3833
    Didley Squat, Jun 26, 2018
    San Diego likes this.
  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    Just baking some cakes.........:emoticon-0107-sweat

    please log in to view this image
     
    #3834
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 26, 2018
    Didley Squat, San Diego, Gordon Armstrong and 1 other person like this.
  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    A bit of advice to the Uruguay World Cup team after their 3-0 win over Russia, don't drink the tea or touch the door handles.
     
    #3835
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 26, 2018
    Didley Squat and San Diego like this.
  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    This may be of interest to someone. A friend of mine has 2 tickets in a corporate box for the next England v Belgium game Thur 28th June. He paid £300 each including flights but he didn't realise when he bought them months ago that it was going to be the same day as his wedding! If you are interested, he is looking for someone to take his place.

    It's at Barnsley Registry Office at 4pm. The bride's name is Nicola -- she's 5'8", about 8 stone, very pretty, has her own income and is a really good cook. Contact me for more details.
     
    #3836
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 26, 2018
    Didley Squat, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    Funny set of rules...........You're not allowed to cycle, but you are allowed to injure a young child or elderly person........

    please log in to view this image
     
    #3837
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 26, 2018
    Didley Squat, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    please log in to view this image
    What a knob <doh>
     
    #3838
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 26, 2018
    Didley Squat, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    Luis Suarez foot ?

    please log in to view this image
     
    #3839
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 26, 2018
    San Diego likes this.
  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
    Staff Member

    Joined:
    Jan 30, 2011
    Messages:
    161,497
    Likes Received:
    298,667
    please log in to view this image
     
    #3840
    Wooperts_duck, Jun 26, 2018
    Didley Squat, San Diego and Gordon Armstrong like this.
Page 192 of 834
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

Share This Page