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The barnsley joke page

Discussion in 'Barnsley' started by kiwiqpr, Mar 25, 2014.

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  1. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2961
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 14, 2018
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  2. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    • When Saddam Hussein was found guilty he was originally sentenced to be shot.

    • His last request was to name his own firing squad: He chose Lampard, Terry and Palmer from 12 yards
     
    #2962
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 14, 2018
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  3. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Arsenal fans being forced to stay and watch the last couple of minutes at the Bournemouth game.

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    #2963
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 14, 2018
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  4. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2964
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 14, 2018
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  5. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2965
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 14, 2018
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  6. kiwiqpr

    kiwiqpr Barnsie Mod

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    Must be a nightmare to sing happy birthday to her.
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    #2966
    kiwiqpr, Jan 16, 2018
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  7. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2967
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 16, 2018
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  8. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2968
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 16, 2018
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  9. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    So, Ryan Giggs is the new Wales manager.

    The Welsh FA has also confirmed they are looking for someone to take charge of the team for friendlies that Giggs can’t be arsed with.
     
    #2969
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 16, 2018
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  10. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Turn a regular sofa into a sofa bed by simply forgetting your wife’s birthday......
     
    #2970
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 16, 2018
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  11. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    What's the difference between Kim Jong Un and Dominoes?

    Dominoes can deliver a hot crispy Hawaiian in less than 20 minutes.
     
    #2971
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 16, 2018
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  12. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2972
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 17, 2018
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  13. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2973
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 20, 2018
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  14. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Met this girl at a party. She said people called her Vivaldi. I asked, "Is that because you're a brilliant violinist?"

    She said, "No, it's because my name is Viv and I work at Aldi."
     
    #2974
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 20, 2018
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  15. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2975
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 20, 2018
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  16. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    #2976
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 20, 2018
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  17. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Just received this back from Channel 4...

    On behalf of Channel 4, may I firstly thank you for your application submitted on behalf of your wife for our new upcoming reality TV show. Also the charming photograph you enclosed of your wife. Whilst agreeing that she could make a worthy contribution to the program if selected, I would point out that there appears to be some misunderstanding of the programmes content and the correct title of the series, which is actually, "Fact Hunt".

    Kind regards,

    Director of Programmes Channel 4.
     
    #2977
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 20, 2018
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  18. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    I pulled my 3-year-old son to playschool in his sledge this morning.

    After finally arriving there twenty minutes later I realised that he was no longer sitting in it.

    So I quickly turned the car around and drove the same route back.
     
    #2978
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 20, 2018
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  19. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    Diane Abbott was asked to comment about Carillion.

    "How many is a Carillion?" She said.
     
    #2979
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 20, 2018
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  20. Wooperts_duck

    Wooperts_duck Well-Known Member
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    • What"s the difference between a hedgehog and a bus full of united supporters?

    • The hedgehog"s got the pricks on the outside.
     
    #2980
    Wooperts_duck, Jan 20, 2018
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Page 149 of 748
: this kiwi dont eat worms, kiwi never sleeps, kiwi was here, LIKE KIWI, kiwis watching you lot, kiwi farts a lot

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