Strange One

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S

ScotlandFanMuir

Well-Known Member
Jan 20, 2010
1,426
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Fife
So this morning I clocked into work at 08:14.

By 08:19 I was away for my morning ****e, which is strange because I usually like to wait until 10 o'clock to break up the morning a bit. It was what is commonly known as a 'pebble dasher', thus a clean one meaning I can now post this thread at 08:33.

Devastating start to the day.

Anyway, good morning you lovely lot.
 
Not been for a "Greyfriars Bobby" this morning as yet.

Will use this thread to keep you all posted should the need arise to crimp one off.
 
This is tragic news. You owe it to yourself to engineer another break into your day. Maybe you can wedge a bit of bread into the bottom of the toaster and cause the fire alarm to be triggered?
 
George Cowley said:
This is tragic news. You owe it to yourself to engineer another break into your day. Maybe you can wedge a bit of bread into the bottom of the toaster and cause the fire alarm to be triggered?
Click to expand...

It's either that or I head back to the bogs for a ferocious 'Tom Tank'.

I haven't decided which would be more beneficial to my day yet.
 
So a 'pebble-dasher' is a 'clean' one? I thought a pebble-dasher was one of those that takes ages to wipe your arse due to the high liquidity and the arse-hair related complications that ensue. A 'clean' **** - as I see it - is one of those extra dry ones that hits the water like a brick and require next to no wipeage. My favourite ****es <ok>
 
I'd agree with Jip's definition. A pebble-dasher is one that pebble-dashes the pan. I think muir means small, dry well-formed ****s like pebbles.
 
George Cowley said:
I'd agree with Jip's definition. A pebble-dasher is one that pebble-dashes the pan. I think muir means small, dry well-formed ****s like pebbles.
Click to expand...

That's what I meant. <ok>

Hate a messy ****e, just means you have to put effort into cleaning yourself and quite frankly I just cant be bothered sometimes.
 
A real blunderbuss can veneer everything within a 270 degree range from point of exit by direct projectile impact and by a series of volatile ricochets and counter ricochets. A strong cardboard skirtlet firmly attached to the waist and carefully positioned to minimise escape routes is recommended prior to stool initiation countdown.
 
I'm just back. Bit of a sticky one and a very unsatisfying wipeout. Will need to give my ringpiece a good soak in the bath before my next rimjob.
 
George Cowley said:
I'd agree with Jip's definition. A pebble-dasher is one that pebble-dashes the pan. I think muir means small, dry well-formed ****s like pebbles.
Click to expand...

Indeed the Cockfather even wrote a song about it "Like pebble dashing on the beach", which coincidentally was utter ****e not surprisingly.
 
Jip Jaap Stam said:
So a 'pebble-dasher' is a 'clean' one? I thought a pebble-dasher was one of those that takes ages to wipe your arse due to the high liquidity and the arse-hair related complications that ensue. A 'clean' **** - as I see it - is one of those extra dry ones that hits the water like a brick and require next to no wipeage. My favourite ****es <ok>
Click to expand...

You are correct, sir. A pebble dasher delivery covers most of the porcelain above the water line and was most likely fired out at velocity. However, I think you should revise the amount of arse-hair you have if fast moving watery ****e is getting caught in it.

Personally, I like the "torpedo" ****e.

Ye drap it in one solid go and it speeds off up the u-bend in a perfect fluid moment. You often feel the need to hum the dambusters theme afterwards.

A close second is the "crossfire" ****e. Ye drap one or more but one of them as it hits the water fires back a droplet of water back up yer anus just before it closes. A rare thrill.
 
George Cowley said:
I'd agree with Jip's definition. A pebble-dasher is one that pebble-dashes the pan. I think muir means small, dry well-formed ****s like pebbles.
Click to expand...

..otherwise known as "rabbit" ****s. Some foods do that to me. If I could work out what those foods were I'd eat them all the time and save a fortune on bog roll.
 
Gambol said:
You are correct, sir. A pebble dasher delivery covers most of the porcelain above the water line and was most likely fired out at velocity. However, I think you should revise the amount of arse-hair you have if fast moving watery ****e is getting caught in it.

Personally, I like the "torpedo" ****e.

Ye drap it in one solid go and it speeds off up the u-bend in a perfect fluid moment. You often feel the need to hum the dambusters theme afterwards.

A close second is the "crossfire" ****e. Ye drap one or more but one of them as it hits the water fires back a droplet of water back up yer anus just before it closes. A rare thrill.
Click to expand...

<laugh>

A rare but scintillating thrill indeed.

I had a 'cube' the other day - just as wide as it is long and a bugger to force out. But once the tip has breached the sphincter, it's all over in no time due to it's shortness. My ringpiece must've been gaping like an alligator's mouth for a good 10 minutes afterwards though.
 
When I got back from a stag weekend in Liverpool I had what I call the 'hot and spicy' ****s for around about 4 days.

The consistency of which changed during it's escape from my anal passage. Starting out soft, extremely soft actually, for say the first 0.5 seconds of relaxing my cheeks, it quickly turned into a more fluidy type - coming from the angle of my arse to hit the toilet water you could compare it to niagra falls.

These are messy and sore. It feels like ****ting out a rather hot curry, taking a layer of skin off on its way. Here's where it gets tragic - you've got one hell of a mess to clean up now, however wiping what is already like a ring of fire with your WORKS toilet paper is an unbearable thought.

Many men would have broken down throughout 4 days of this but I powered through, just.
 
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