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Spurs v Palace

Discussion in 'Crystal Palace' started by Hoddle is a god, Nov 5, 2017.

  1. So, it's 0-0 at half-time.

    I know you lads are fighting for survival, and that Roy isn't the most dynamic of managers, but wouldn't you rather he had the balls to open up a bit and give this a go?

    Sure, we'd probably end up smashing you 4 or 5 nil, but at least you'd have the pride of knowing you turned up and gave it a go ffs!

    Let's hope we an grab a goal early in the second half, to force you lads to come out and play some football.
    <ok>
     
    #1
  2. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    How did that turn out ?
     
    #2
  3. Context, Pix. Always read the whole post, mate, as it will save you from embarrassment.
     
    #3
  4. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    I did. You ****ed it up.
     
    #4
  5. <doh>
     
    #5
  6. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    Did you smash them by 4 or 5 goals mate ?
     
    #6
  7. You know what the score was!
    <doh>

    I said we’d smash them if they opened up against us. They didn’t. Therefore, we didn’t smash them.

    Please don’t force me to draw a diagram for you, mate.
     
    #7
  8. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    So you didn’t smash them by 4 or 5 goals then ?

    Please draw the diagram, should be a right laugh seeing your **** up in pictorial form <ok>
     
    #8
  9. I see that you’re still having difficulty grasping this. I’ll take you through this in baby steps, mate.

    First, answer this simple question.

    Did Palace open up against us or did they park the bus?
     
    #9
  10. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    Dunno, didn’t see the game, just the score. Was it 4-0 or 5-0 ?
     
    #10

  11. Okay.

    Well, I can tell you that they parked the bus.

    Step 2.

    Do you accept that “parking the bus” is the opposite to “opening up?”
     
    #11
  12. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    Not really. There’s more than simply two dimensions to tactics mate.

    Although I understand that your scratch the surface knowledge probably hasn’t taken that into account.
     
    #12
  13. Excellent.

    So, you accept that “parking the bus” is different to “opening up.”

    We’re getting somewhere.

    Step 3

    When I wrote “we’ll smash you if you open up” and Palace didn’t “open up,” and we didn’t smash Palace, can you see the logical connection in what I wrote?
     
    #13
  14. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    The opposite of parking the bus isn’t necessarily opening up though, you’re trying to oversimplify the tactics. Teams will use a myriad of tactics during a game and depending on the strengths and weaknesses of their own players and those of the opposition. They will also tweak tactics depending on how the game pans out.

    I know this is like trying to explain particle physics to a goat, but I thought I’d let you know all the same
     
    #14
  15. Good.

    So, you accept that what I wrote made perfect sense.

    We’re nearly there, Pix.

    Step 4

    Repeat these words, mate...

    “I must stop acting like a bell-end.”

    Keep repeating them for about ten minutes.
     
    #15
  16. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    No mate. You have failed to understand the basic concepts of football tactics.

    That doesn’t surprise me. Hence your **** up that you would ‘smash 4 or 5’ past them.

    Happy to help <ok>
     
    #16
  17. “I must stop being a bell-end.”

    Keep saying it, Pix.
     
    #17
  18. PINKIE

    PINKIE Wurzel Gummidge

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    You’ve ****ed up again mate. Don’t try and say I haven’t tried to help you out.
     
    #18
  19. Treble

    Treble Keyser Söze

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    Patrick's climaxing face

    please log in to view this image
     
    #19
    organic red and PINKIE like this.

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