Snodgrass

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Charlie1 said:
The Penguin is the equivalent of a bourbon biscuit. Too plain, not enough going on. Snodgrass would be a cross between a Breakaway and a Rocky. At best. FACT!
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Thin, fragile, easy to break and small??

Bugger off!
 
Happy Tiger said:
Oh come on ffs.

Penguins - (the originals) - Thick, solid and chocolaty
Blue Riband - Wafery crap. If you like these, when you get a selection box of biscuits, I bet you go for the pink wafers first and not the bourbons or choccy fingers.
Rockies - Like Penguin, but smaller, less choccy. Similar quality to the 'Guin, but, less of it.
Breakaway - Too thin. Not fulfilling.
Tunnocks - Marshmallow? Frig me. No. Even rolling them in coconut doesn't redeem these.
Yo-Yo - The round mint things? Friggin hell no. Mint? Its bad enough in ice cream ffs, in a choccy bar, just no.
Viscount - See Yo-Yo
Wagon Wheels - More a treat than a regular school lunch thing. They are not as good nowadays as they were.

Tunnocks, well actually yeah, I do love them, on an equal par with the mighty 'Guin I think.

Snodgrass would be a Penguin. No airs and graces, he'd get stuck in for us.
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Tunnocks caramel wafer with chocolate, the king of bars. Not the poncey marshmallow ****e. That in itself is more appropriate to the Penguin biscuit league.
 
Mr. Hat said:
If I was to dispose of them, I would restrain them solidly on a very sturdy table and position a large mirror directly above it. I would begin by very carefully removing their eyelids, taking extreme caution not to damage their eyes, so that they have no choice but to watch proceedings. Next, I would take a blunt angle grinder and use it to remove the subjects penis with difficulty, before shoving it in their mouth and holding it in place via a very hi-tech bonding agent (ductape).

Once the formalities are done with, I would appetise by removing fingernails and toenails one by one with a pair of pliers, before proceeding to remove the teeth. Next I would firmly insert a wide section of hosing into the subject anal canal, then thread through a rusty length of barbed wire through the hosepipe, then very carefuly remove the hosepipe leaving the barbed wire bare inside the anus. The barbed wire would then be tied to a large dogs collar, and a bonio would be thrown to the other side of the room for the dog to chase after and feast on.

I believe by this point the life force of the subject would be dropping to dangerously low levels, in which case I would move on to the grand finale. Have an old scrap engine ready on a large engine crane (or any heavy object prepared ready on a tall crank/pulley system) and position the engine directly above the subjects head at a reasonable height. Patiently wait for a minute or so for any swaying to cease, then cut the rope.

Take a large bow with a flourish of your cape and a tip of your hat. Job well done.
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This is ridiculous.

When the engine fell, it would break the mirror (you have both directly above their head). This would incur 7 years bad luck. Please rethink the finale.
 
Mr. Hat said:
If I was to dispose of them, I would restrain them solidly on a very sturdy table and position a large mirror directly above it. I would begin by very carefully removing their eyelids, taking extreme caution not to damage their eyes, so that they have no choice but to watch proceedings. Next, I would take a blunt angle grinder and use it to remove the subjects penis with difficulty, before shoving it in their mouth and holding it in place via a very hi-tech bonding agent (ductape).

Once the formalities are done with, I would appetise by removing fingernails and toenails one by one with a pair of pliers, before proceeding to remove the teeth. Next I would firmly insert a wide section of hosing into the subject anal canal, then thread through a rusty length of barbed wire through the hosepipe, then very carefuly remove the hosepipe leaving the barbed wire bare inside the anus. The barbed wire would then be tied to a large dogs collar, and a bonio would be thrown to the other side of the room for the dog to chase after and feast on.

I believe by this point the life force of the subject would be dropping to dangerously low levels, in which case I would move on to the grand finale. Have an old scrap engine ready on a large engine crane (or any heavy object prepared ready on a tall crank/pulley system) and position the engine directly above the subjects head at a reasonable height. Patiently wait for a minute or so for any swaying to cease, then cut the rope.

Take a large bow with a flourish of your cape and a tip of your hat. Job well done.
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Like the last poster I would highlight a flaw in your plan. How could you remove the teeth with a penis already in their mouth? Schoolboy error.
 
Charlie1 said:
Like the last poster I would highlight a flaw in your plan. How could you remove the teeth with a penis already in their mouth? Schoolboy error.
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There was a story long ago about someone getting their penis chopped off in the public toilets at the junction of Greenwood Ave and Ellerburn Ave, the doctors was in the same block of buildings, it did'nt help him he died through loss of blood.
Therefore I would suggest leaving this part of your dissposal plan till later, or your subject would miss some of the best bits.
 
lewisc29 said:
I disagree, we are the weakest on the wings and Snodgrass offers excellent end product, a danger from free kicks and premier league experience. We could do a lot worse.
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We could do worse i agree on that and we can do better than Snodgrass. I would take Redmond any day of the week ahead of Snodgrass.
 
Hutch_Tiger said:
If we need a rwb/rb think kieran trippier would be grest competition for elmo
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I'd have loved us to get him but with Burnley getting promoted he'd both cost a bomb now and be more difficult to get over here.

Maybe if they get relegated, though I suspect he may have better suitors after a premier league campaign as the lad looks a real talent.
 
Hutch_Tiger said:
If we need a rwb/rb think kieran trippier would be grest competition for elmo
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That ship sadly sailed when Burnley finished 2nd in the championship. I wonder if Man City have an option on him in case he comes good ??

John Ex Aberdeen now E.R. said:
I watched Redmond last night for the U21's against South Korea, he is good but need to learn not to be so greedy with the ball.
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True. But we have the same issue with Aluko and Brady at times. That bad habit can soon be knocked out of him.
 
The FRENCH TICKLER said:
That ship sadly sailed when Burnley finished 2nd in the championship. I wonder if Man City have an option on him in case he comes good ??



True. But we have the same issue with Aluko and Brady at times. That bad habit can soon be knocked out of him.
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So the torture thread is back on track, just how do you plan to knock this bad habit out of him? baseball or cricket bat?
 
I'd like to know whose negotiating these deals.

£16m on two players, one who was relegated & the other a reserve player, is alot of dough.

Hope i'm wrong & it works out for City.

So much for Allam being skint. Another pack of lies he was peddling.
 
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