Twenty or so years ago, When Saturday Comes started printing footballing haikus from readers (would 4-4-2 do that? I rest my case). I can only remember two of them, but DR's Stilton offering brought them back to my mind. They're not Fulhamish, but they're good: Jensen, Parlour, Hillier: Can you think of a midfield sillier? - - - Steve MacManamanamanamanamanamanaman. Great name.
Haiku on the transfer market and fans: Fast-flowing river, Water speeds ever onwards; Stones remain in place.
Onwards and Upwards My Grandad, wise old head, Said, you can't turn the clock back But you can rewind it
Two seasons, three goals Dembele, we loved you still Sad to see you go Clint scratches his head "Why not me?", Dempsey does asks. Where is Sunderland?
Motspur Park Medical Room 30th August 2012 Flick of hair, *** in hand Laconic stroll through, to hallowed ground That's the man, Berbatov please log in to view this image
Upton Park Saturday 1st September 2012 Cottagers keep high balls low Hammers hoof 'n puff through empty bubbles Berbatov content with a double
Craven Cottage Saturday 15th September 2012 Nay, twas not to be on that day The Smiler moved for'ard West To Baggie his double, his own way
Would you believe, my eldest came home from school today and said they had been writing haikus; it's got me started again. As the teacher required the kids to use the classic 5-7-5 formation, rather than the more freeform 17 syllables that I tend towards, I thought I'd force myself to meet the same criteria: Monday 10th December, Craven Cottage Fulham-Newcastle, 1-1. Who heads the winner? Strewth! Rodallega! An alternative final line: 'Stone me, it's Hugo!' I can't make up my mind which I prefer. Fulham - Newcastle
The latter Captain, and thanks for resurrecting the thread. Although you might regret it. Loftus Road ha ha Two forty k guess the score? Zero one, Hugo again!
Yesterday's heroics have inspired me. With apologies to the hard-rocking fraternity among us, the following is a decidedly middle-of-the-road ditty to the tune of Abba's Thank you for the Music. Let's hope we're soon middle-of-the-table as well. Thank you for Steve Sidwell, the goals he's scoring. Supporting Fulham's never boring. Even Bent gets goals now I ask in all honesty, how can this be? With Mitroglou on the pitch, we'd score three! So I say thank you all at Fulham For a moral victory.
Holbty deflty puts Sidwell in Unmarked he slides and volleys, can we win? No guts no glory, They chant in the dressing room Twelve minutes to go Rvp draws level. A cruel deflection, two one, the crowd goes boom One minute left Richardson's played through De Gea just parries for Bent to nod in A draw, a point, I know, it's true!
'Whites, wha hae Woy Woy bled, Whites, wham Brede has aften led, Welcome tae yer gory bed, Or tae victorie. 'Now's the day, an now's the hour: See the Championship table lour, See approach proud Brendan’s power- Leeds and Barns-ley. Wha, for Fulham's fans and law, Premier league football wi strongly draw, Fulham stand, or Fulham fa, Let him on wi me. Adapted from Rabbie Burn's 'Scot's wi hae', much like my earlier edit of Hausman I think it reads better now!
To continue the one liners. Not sure who said it but it could have been said about the situation and hanging on to Jol: "Failure is not fatal, but failure to change might be."
