Soooooo. Back to Higgs being born in two places at once. Even being a small baby when born, quantum effects wouldn't allow that to happen. He was only born in Newcastle
Borrow MFG's time machine, whip yourself back to the day of Higgs' birth. Split him in two, take each half to each location, whip back to Newcastle and put him back together. All this using highly advanced alien surgical technology you've acquired thousands of years in the future. That's deffo worth a Nobel Prize
Mary Nightingale on ITN news has just said Higgs has won the Nobel peace prize. Surely a mistake? I had Gerrez and Tobes down for that as a joint award...
Not one dead cat. http://www.theguardian.com/science/video/2012/jul/03/what-is-a-higgs-boson-video I'm not convinced....
Heinz Wolf is going to demonstrate the HB on Newsnight by throwing a pebble at a large torch, I think. How much did that big ****-off collider cost on the Swizz-French border? They should have asked Heinz and Magnus Pike years ago, and we'd have saved an awful lot of money that we could have spent on second-hand US ICBM submarines that we don't have the launch codes for. Science - pah.
Don't take it out on me - it's Scroedinger's experiment. Dunno why he chose a cat, but he's the egghead with a lab coat and pens in his shirt pocket, so he must be right.
Schrödinger's cat: a cat, a flask of poison, and a radioactive source are placed in a sealed box. If an internal monitor detects radioactivity (i.e. a single atom decaying), the flask is shattered, releasing the poison that kills the cat. The Copenhagen interpretation of quantum mechanics implies that after a while, the cat is simultaneously alive and dead. Yet, when one looks in the box, one sees the cat either alive or dead, not both alive and dead. This poses the question of when exactly quantum superposition ends and reality collapses into one possibility or the other. Can you translate that for me?
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Your cat gets it in the name of science. But on the plus side it'll eventually lead to transporters like in Star trek. Worth a few (thousand) dead cats, and relief on the garden-bird population too. Then again, it might lead to some people getting fly's heads (an improvement for wayne rooney, doubtless). Either that or we wait for someone to develop a brand of Floo Powder that actually works. But they'll probably have to test that on cats too.
