Operation

no helmet either

 

Oh right.

Index finger was mince meated. They'd have needed to have pack it in a sausage skin to stitch that back on.

Middle was stitched back on. I guess they must have done something to preserve it. I dunno. I was a bit busy being in shock at the time.

Ring finger was still attached enough to have blood flow.

Nigel says hi.

 

ER's disfigured penis.

(I just caught on that ye were speaking as the penis )

 

Did you get a good severance package when you left British Steel?

 

ba-dom-tsh

Actually I did when BS shut down. Got ****in ripped off on ma compensation for the accident though

 

Only time i've gone under the knife (Hammer actually) was when I fractured my arm (twice in 2 years). They put me to sleep to break it fully. Which was nice.

 

Pfft. Nancy boy.

 

I have spent a bit of time in hospital, most notably when I set myself on fire...accidentally. 2 weeks in IC and 2 weeks in a General Ward.

It was a military hospital and there was a not a General to be seen. Highest rank was a Colonel.

 

Where was Harold Shipman when we needed him most?

 

Not spontaneous combustion like the drummers in Spinal Tap?

 

Rochdale I think.

 

Nah, 40 litres of Meths. And not the drinking kind.

 

.

 

Buffalo Soldier

Good film