Seeing as the last one got shut down (and maybe that was the intention of some who didn't appreciate the jokes posted there) - can we have an offensive jokes thread without people turning it into the politics thread please?
Off Topic Offensive Jokes thread mark 2
- Thread starter tigerrev
- Start date
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So - anyone got any jokes? Offensive or otherwise 
So - anyone got any jokes? Offensive or otherwise
How do you know when your girlfriend is too young for you?
When you have to make the, here comes the aeroplane sound to get your cock in her mouth.
Jimmy Carr.
I'll reopen this once I've tidied it up.
Once reopened, if posters can't Police themselves, I'll simply block those trying to use it as a political soap box from posting on it.
Once reopened, if posters can't Police themselves, I'll simply block those trying to use it as a political soap box from posting on it.
I was the thousandth man that shagged Bonnie Blue. It felt like feeding Stephen Hawking yoghurt.
My mate walked in the pub with his missus and the barman said, "Punching above your weight there aren't you, pal? Where did you find her?"
"I met her in Thailand," he replied. "We're due to get married next month."
"You don't want to get married," he said. "That's when the blowjobs stop."
"I don't mind that," he replied. "I hate giving her them anyway!
"I met her in Thailand," he replied. "We're due to get married next month."
"You don't want to get married," he said. "That's when the blowjobs stop."
"I don't mind that," he replied. "I hate giving her them anyway!
What is the difference between girls/women aged: 8, 18, 28, 38, 48, 58, 68, and 78?
At 8 — You take her to bed and tell her a story.
At 18 — You tell her a story and take her to bed.
At 28 — You don’t need to tell her a story to take her to bed.
At 38 — She tells you a story and takes you to bed.
At 48 — She tells you a story to avoid going to bed.
At 58 — You stay in bed to avoid her story.
At 68 — If you take her to bed, that’ll be a story!
At 78 — What story??? What bed??? Who the hell are you???
At 8 — You take her to bed and tell her a story.
At 18 — You tell her a story and take her to bed.
At 28 — You don’t need to tell her a story to take her to bed.
At 38 — She tells you a story and takes you to bed.
At 48 — She tells you a story to avoid going to bed.
At 58 — You stay in bed to avoid her story.
At 68 — If you take her to bed, that’ll be a story!
At 78 — What story??? What bed??? Who the hell are you???
A bunch of politicians from all parties walk into a bar, they order hundreds of drinks, put it on the taxpayer tab & then shut the pub down!
Too soon?
Too soon?
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Is that Mickey from the League of Gentlemen?
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