Off Topic Mental Health Discussion Thread

Sadly there are some scum out there...

 

There is a chap around the Avenues area constantly asking people for money, cigarettes etc.

He wears Hull City shirts (very dirty ones).

I've seen him every day for the last few weeks.

To cut a long story short.

He doesn't ask me for anything anymore...

 

Onwards and upwards, great news, really happy for you

 

I'm going through a rubbish time currently. Lost my dad last month. Have assignments for university I'm trying to get finished to submit but, my heads all over the place. Have no enjoyment with anything. Legit have no idea what to do. I'm pleased I found this thread because, atleast it's somewhere I can reach out. I'm struggling my fellow tigers. I am

 

Grief is a tough one mate. I lost my Dad a few years ago and I found that so hard, it's untrue.

I still want to talk football with him, in fact I still do. I know when I have an opinion on a game or a player or a manager, I feel like I know what his reply is.

This thing you're going through isn't easy at all.

I can only send you love and I know everyone else on here will do the same.

Give it some time mate, it does ease x

 

Talk to your personal tutor (or equivalent) about the assignments. Given your recent loss I'm sure they'll be supportive.


Grief ain't easy mate, it takes time. It's easy to spout platitudes but you will smile again. You will find yourself enjoying things again. Dunno when. But you will.

Talking is so important. If you have a friend who can listen that's worth so much.

Or a phoneline if needed.

Or even on here.


Remember, the darkest hour is just before dawn.

Good idea to post on here btw.

Take care.

 

Thank you for replying to me, I'm similar would love to discuss the Bournemouth game or the Derby game with him. He got me into the life of loving City.

What do I do about my university studies? That's a great concern of mine. I'm heading into my final year and passed the point of even caring.

 

It is hard to climb out of the pit that is for certain.
Take a breath
Let out your real emotions, write them down, shout, do whatever you think is a release. Post them on here if you like, no one knows who you are.

The truth is that you are going to have a bit of a difficult time, accept that and work out how you can move on in little steps.

Getting back to the pit, if you look up you will
see daylight. All you need to do is start climbing, nice and easy. Others will worry about you, tell them how you actually feel without embarrassment. Do not overload or burden them, just say “I ain’t coping too well at the moment”. Contact your uni welfare officers.
You cannot do this without help, you know that, but you can take the first step and never feel that you are alone. There are plenty of us on here.

 

Honestly my real emotions are deep sadness, regret and some anger.

I regret that I never really saw the warning signs that my dad was drinking himself to oblivion. They were all there! Literally right infront of my face. He'd go out every day have a few drinks then continue home drinking on a night. Every night without fail. The routine was that recurrent that I stupidly and regrettably never saw it as a major issue. I was such an idiot. I feel complicit in some way of his demised. That's why I'm angry. Very angry. By doing nothing and not confronting the very real problem I helped my dad to get himself so poorly and eventually lose his life.

Having that all the time in my head is torture. Absolute torture

 

You're Dad was an alcoholic then. You couldn't have stopped that anyway mate.

Alcoholics can only do that for themselves, you can trust me on that.

I have empathy for your Dad, because I struggle with the devil myself. It isn't easy.

 

The lads with a drink problem will tell you that there is nothing that you could have done, that will not ease the anger, but it is a fact.

 

He was stuck in the denial stage of alcoholism. He didn't believe he was and neither did I. I always miss him.

 

The Omega Man said to write things down. I think that is a very important thing to do.
We all tend to forget the thoughts we had the night or the weeks before.

 

I think I need to write things down. Could write everything I feel put them in a box and return to it a year later.

 

That's right Dazza. You'll cry when you read those things, but that's something we shouldn't try to escape anyway.

Up the Tigers

 

I'm sorry for your loss..

I'll tell you exactly what you do about your university studies,you get your head out of your backside and work harder than you've ever worked before,do that for your Dad.
It's still very raw for you,you're blaming yourself,it's natural.I've lost both parents in the last 7 years,the first being my Mum.That hit me like a ton of bricks,I loved her dearly and the grief was unbearable,it lessens through time.There's not a day goes by that I don't think about her but it's happy thoughts,you've got that coming as part of the grieving process.

Stop blaming yourself for a start,there's nothing you could have done about your Fathers drinking habits,that was down to him and you couldn't have changed that.Take one day at a time,cry when you need to because bottling it up will make you unwell.

Look at the posts above mine,they're full of support,friendship and concern...Take some comfort from the fact that we all care and we're here for you

 

You’ll be understandably suffering with grief now, and for a while. And periodically for a long time.
Missing your Dad won’t stop, and neither should it, I still miss mine and he’s been gone decades. However you might benefit from some bereavement counselling https://www.cruse.org.uk/get-help/local-services/yorkshire-and-humber/hull-and-east-riding
In terms of your Uni work I think it’s highly likely that they’d give you more time for assignments or other adjustments. You need to start the conversation with them ASAP though, or get someone to do that on your behalf.
Talking on here is great, and I’m not suggesting you stop at all, but you may need some professional help too
Take care

 

Numbers down locally

https://www.hulldailymail.co.uk/new...kCopy&utm_medium=social&utm_campaign=sharebar

 

I'm really struggling at the moment. My anxiety is quite high at the moment.

It's situational with my job though. I hate my job.

I am looking for a new job.

 

Sorry to hear this, anxiety is a right bastard. I try and tell myself its me brain over-reacting to a perceived threat, but being logical doesn't always help when those overwhelming feelings bubble up and take over all other rational thought processes.

Fingers crossed you get the job situation sorted soon.

You probably know this already, but I'll say it anyway - you can self-refer for talking therapy on the NHS: https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/ta...rapies-and-counselling/nhs-talking-therapies/ Also, some anti-depressant medications work well for anxiety and your GP should be able to help.