A tortoise is walking down the street when he was assaulted by 2 snails, when the police came and asked him what happened he said " I couldn't tell you it happened so fast"
Burial At Sea Betty and Barbie, two blonde sisters, had promised their uncle that they would bury him at sea when he died. Their uncle had been a seafaring gentleman throughout his life and it was his final wish. Of course, in due time, he did pass away and the two blondes kept their promise. They cast off from port with their uncle all stitched up in a burial bag and loaded onto his rowing boat. After rowing for quite some time, Betty says, 'Do you think that we're out far enough?' Barbie slips over the side and almost immediately says, 'No, this will never do . . . . the water is only up to my chest.' So they row some more, and Barbie slips over the side once again and disappears. Quite a bit of time goes by while Barbie is under water and poor Betty is really getting worried. Suddenly, Barbie breaks the surface, gasping for breath. 'Well is it deep enough yet, Sis?' Betty inquires. 'Yes, finally . . . . hand me the shovel.'
