A dwarf was drinking in a bar when a sexy blonde walked up to him and said “I’ve always wanted to have sex with a little person” The dwarf replied “I’m sorry, but I’ve had women say that before, then I go home with them and the husband or boyfriend finds out and I get beaten up” “It’s ok” said the woman “ my husband is working away until next week “ So, against his better judgment he goes back with the woman. Well, they start having amazing sex, when suddenly the front door opens. “****, it’s my husband “ she said “ quick, hang out of the bedroom window, and when he goes for a shower, you can climb in and get away” So the dwarf climbs out of the window and hangs on the ledge by his fingertips. The husband comes in the bedroom and says “ it’s cold in here” and slams the window shut and the dwarf plummets to the ground. Well the woman is distraught and calls an ambulance. A couple of days later she goes to visit the dwarf in hospital “How are you” ? She asked “Well my fingers are broken, I’ve got two broken ankles, a dislocated hip and severe concussion “ he said “Oh dear” she said “Still , it could have been much worse “ “Much worse !!!!?” Said the dwarf “How do you figure that out” “Well” she said “You’re lucky that I live in a bungalow"
I've just been down a street where the houses were numbered 64K, 128K, 256K, 512K & 1MB. That was a trip down memory lane !
A man goes to the doctor's and says "Hey Doc, every time I masturbate I keep singing, Glory Glory Man United" Doctor says "Don’t worry . . . . lots of ****ers sing that"
A tough looking group of hairy bikers are riding when they see a girl about to jump off a bridge, so they stop. The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says, "What are you doing?" "I'm going to commit suicide," she says. While he doesn’t want to appear insensitive, he also doesn’t want to miss an opportunity, so he asks, "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?" She does, and it is a long, deep, lingering kiss. After she's finished, the tough, hairy biker says, "Wow! That was the best kiss I’ve ever had! That's a real talent you’re wasting. You could be famous. Why are you committing suicide?" "My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl…"
Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch."
