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Off Topic Just for Mr RAWhite

Discussion in 'Sunderland' started by Smug in Boots, Jan 19, 2015.

Page 363 of 1994
  1. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    BBC BREAKING NEWS..

    Costa coffee bought for 3.8 billion.
    It must have been one of those extra large latte's with the caramel topping
     
    #7241
    Gil T Azell, Nov 9, 2020
    MrRAWhite likes this.
  2. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    Did a sexual harassment course earlier today at work.
    Think I’m going to be really good at it.
     
    #7242
    Gil T Azell, Nov 9, 2020
    MrRAWhite, Draig, Deletion Requested1 and 2 others like this.
  3. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    Well there's me tree up.

    bog.jpg
     
    #7243
    Gil T Azell, Nov 9, 2020
    RTB, mrs em, MrRAWhite and 3 others like this.
  4. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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    A kid wearing a bear mask walks into a bar, claims he's old enough to drink and orders a pint.

    The barman asks if he's really telling the truth.

    "No it's just a bear faced lie." <doh>
     
    #7244
    Smug in Boots, Nov 9, 2020
    MrRAWhite, Gordon Armstrong and Gil T Azell like this.
  5. rooch 3

    rooch 3 Well-Known Member

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    You can have two more mate <doh><doh>
     
    #7245
    Last edited: Nov 9, 2020
    rooch 3, Nov 9, 2020
    Smug in Boots likes this.
  6. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    MY DAD ONCE TOLD ME “IF YOU EVER GET IN A FIGHT IN A PUB, PUT A SNOOKER BALL IN YOUR SOCK”
    WORSE ADVICE EVER, I COULD HARDLY ****ING WALK!!
     
    #7246
    Gil T Azell, Nov 9, 2020
    Makemstine Roger, Draig, Montysoptician and 6 others like this.
  7. Vincemac

    Vincemac Well-Known Member

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    I have a phobia of trampolines..

    I can't help it, they just always make me jump!
     
    #7247
    Vincemac, Nov 10, 2020
    MrRAWhite, Makemstine Roger, Draig and 3 others like this.
  8. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    Just remove yourself from the board for 7 days will ya mate <laugh>.
     
    #7248
    Gil T Azell, Nov 10, 2020
    MrRAWhite, Vincemac, Makemstine Roger and 1 other person like this.
  9. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    Great news, I see pfizer have created a new Covid-19 vaccine which is 90% effective!!
    Unlike our immune systems which are only 99.7% effective.
     
    #7249
    Gil T Azell, Nov 10, 2020
    Makemstine Roger and rooch 3 like this.
  10. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    I've finished writing my new book. The A to C of laziness.
     
    #7250
    Gil T Azell, Nov 10, 2020
    Draig, farnboromackem and rooch 3 like this.

  11. Gil T Azell

    Gil T Azell Well-Known Member

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    pen.jpg
     
    #7251
    Gil T Azell, Nov 10, 2020
    MrRAWhite, Makemstine Roger, flandersmackem and 1 other person like this.
  12. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Two crocodiles were laying on the bank of the river Thames in London, the smaller one turned to the bigger one and said "I can't understand how you came to be bigger than me, We're the same age, the same size as kids, so I just don't get it."
    "Well," said the big croc,' "what have you been eating?"
    "Politicians, same as you", replied the small croc, "I catch them in the car park at Parliament. I crawl under one of the posh cars, wait until someone unlocks the car door, then I grab them by the leg, shake the **** out of them and eat them."
    "Aha," said the big croc, "I think I see your problem, you're not getting proper nourishment. You see, by the time you've finished shaking the **** out of a politician, all you've got left is an arsehole and a briefcase.
     
    #7252
    Makemstine Roger, Nov 11, 2020
    Nig, MrRAWhite, cumbrianmackem and 5 others like this.
  13. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #7253
    Makemstine Roger, Nov 11, 2020
    Nig, Snaggey, MrRAWhite and 5 others like this.
  14. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    Only the second man in the history of the world to walk on water

    please log in to view this image
     
    #7254
    Makemstine Roger, Nov 11, 2020
    Nig, MrRAWhite, Gil T Azell and 2 others like this.
  15. Vincemac

    Vincemac Well-Known Member

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    upload_2020-11-11_19-3-51.png
     
    #7255
    Vincemac, Nov 11, 2020
    Nig, Montysoptician, MrRAWhite and 5 others like this.
  16. Smug in Boots

    Smug in Boots Well-Known Member

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    I once landed a job as a circus dwarf despite being 6 feet tall ...

    ... I was billed as the biggest dwarf in the world.
     
    #7256
    Smug in Boots, Nov 11, 2020
    Montysoptician, MrRAWhite, Makemstine Roger and 3 others like this.
  17. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    please log in to view this image
     
    #7257
    Makemstine Roger, Nov 11, 2020
    RTB, mrs em, Sandy Camel and 3 others like this.
  18. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    A Liverpool girl enters an adult shop and asks for a vibrator.

    The man says: "Choose one from our range on the wall." She says "I'll take that red one."

    The man replies: "That's a fire extinguisher."
     
    #7258
    Makemstine Roger, Nov 11, 2020
    Nig, Somebodys pinched my sombrero, farnboromackem and 2 others like this.
  19. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    I applied to be a sperm donor, the nurse asked if i could **** in the cup

    I told her i'm pretty good but I don't think i'm ready to compete in a tournament yet.
     
    #7259
    Makemstine Roger, Nov 11, 2020
    Nig, farnboromackem, Mad Dog and 2 others like this.
  20. Makemstine Roger

    Makemstine Roger Well-Known Member

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    #7260
    Makemstine Roger, Nov 11, 2020
    Gil T Azell, Nig, cumbrianmackem and 2 others like this.
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