It’s been a bit of a strange day. First I found a hat full of money. Then I was chased by an angry man with a guitar
I got arrested in B&Q earlier . . . . I was out shopping with Mrs. A. and she said “go in there and find a Black and Decker”
An Englishman, Frenchman, Spaniard and a German are watching a street performer. They are standing at the back of the crowd, so the street performer stands on a platform and asks them, "Can you see me?" And they reply, yes, oui, si, ya!
I applied for a job as a tightrope walker at a circus for people with mental health issues. Didn't get the job, they said it was because I was unbalanced