My mate set me up on a blind date. He said, "She's a lovely lass, but there's something you should know. She's expecting a baby." I felt a right tw*t waiting in the pub wearing nothing but a nappy!
My wife got her credit cards stolen but the guy is spending less money than her, so l’m just going to let it ride!
Last night was windy . . . . I now have 3 trampolines, a couple of hot tubs, a couple of gazebos and a spare caravan for sale. PM for details.