New studies show that most women have highly intelligent DNA at least once in their life But most spit it out
It started out with unusual jobs you'd had which reminds me ... ... I was once given a day's trial at a barbers but I couldn't quite cut it. A typical case of 'hair today, gone tomorrow'
An Irish man went into a bar and ordered three shots of whisky The bartender said said shall I put them in one glass to make it easier for you to drink I said No I am drinking a shot for my self and one each for my two brothers over in Ireland The next night he goes into the bar and asks for two shots The barman is confused and said I am sorry has something happened to your brothers as you are only having two shots No no every thing is fine Ive just stopped drinking alcohol
I walked into a bar with me wife Bartender said do you want a beer for your wife I said yes seems a fair trade
Not so much a joke, but something I done at work a few years back....it's quite a long story, so bear with me. (Apologies if anyone finds it insensitive, it wasn't meant that way). I work in a Cancer Care Hospice, and part and parcel of that, sadly, is that we have a mortuary. It is located next door to the laundry, which is where the cating staff collect their uniforms prior to starting their shift. We had a catering assistant at work, a Nigerian lass who was deeply religious...a devout Christian. She would sing hymns and would pray to The Lord throughout the day. A really nice lass who I had a lot of time for, and who could normally take a joke. She had been here quite a while, but had been unaware of what was in the room next door to where she collected her uniform....it was always locked, and she would have no reason to go in there anyway. One day she said that someone had told her that's where they put bodies, and asked me if it was true. I explained that in the room there was a large mortuary fridge, and the deceased were put in there until they were collected by an undertaker. She asked some questions like how many are in there?, how long are they in there for?, what happens if the fridge breaks?.... She was horrified that she had been going into the laundry, completely unaware of what was next door, and over the next few days the hymns and the prayers went up a notch. Now, I maybe shouldn't have done it, but I put this in the walk-in fridge in the kitchen. This consisted of (l to r) a large cabbage, a sack of carrots, two rolls of clingfilm, and bit of cardboard, and covered with a table cloth. When she went i and seen it, she went bloody nuts. A scream, followed by wailing, chanting, arms waving, praying the lot. I dunno what I was expecting, but it wasn't that....I was ****ting it tbh. Once I had shown her what was really underneath she eventually calmed down, though I don't think she trusted me much after.
